


AftG Headcannons, Prompts, Shorts

by hatehateslove



Series: Compilations! [1]
Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2018-07-27 15:52:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 98
Words: 37,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7624693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hatehateslove/pseuds/hatehateslove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of my work that I've posted on Tumblr!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Notes

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I have a Tumblr @hatehateslove! Where I take prompts for p much anything from TFC, TRC, SH, etc. So, I've compiled some as chapters on Ao3 for convenience! (For both you and me) 
> 
> This one is specifically for TFC. I might post another for my TRC content, after seeing how well this one goes.

  
Works will most probably be posted in no particular order, it'll be just as much of a mess as everything else.

Short/Long/Medium length works will _all_  get their own chapters (Yes, even the one's that are barely a hundred words long - unless I have reason to combine some (esp in terms of chronological order for a few).

Headcannons will be posted bullet point style, just as my tumblr.

I'm not going to edit anything, you're going to get exactly what I've already posted.

I might post the original prompt as the chapter summary/beginning notes or just summarize depending on the prompt. 

I'm not going to update one chapter at a time, more like a bunch at a time, spread out. (EDIT: I'm posting 5 chapters at a time!) 

They'll start the chapter after this one.

I'll add as I need to if I think of anything.

Thanks and I hope you like!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Our Foxes play together for the last time as a full team.

Ok so this became a lot longer than I’d intended, and less headcanonish than anything. But I hope you like it <3

  * They entered the Spring Championships with heavy hearts because they knew that every match they played could be their last.
  * They had hoped that they would make semifinals.
  * They did not anticipate making finals - against USC.
  * They trained and trained and trained, but with almost all their new players either injured or redcarded, they didn’t have very high hopes.
  * But they were ok with that, they had given their all the whole season, and they had made it to finals.
  * Wymack had promised a few rounds on him no matter the outcome.
  * But that wasn’t gonna stop our Foxes from fighting tooth and nail to come out on top.
  * Andrew’s at goal, Matt and Aaron are our backliners, Neil and Kevin are our strikers, and our dealer Dan.
  * Neil and Kevin are having a screaming match on the court during the game bc they’re down 2 goals and there’s less than a minute on the clock.
  * :56 Andrew’s tired.
  * :47 Dan’s getting angry - but there’s only so much she can do, so she slows down. It’s her last match as a Fox. She isn’t about to ruin it. She runs to Matt.
  * :45 She doesn’t notice Neil and Kevin noticing her.
  * :39 She doesn’t notice as they nod to each other, then look at Andrew, who perked up when he noticed Kevin and Neil stop yelling, he’s grinning as he nods.
  * :35 She doesn’t notice as Aaron singlehandedly takes up Matt’s mark and his own, as Matt opens his arms to hug Dan.
  * :30 She doesn’t notice as Kevin, Neil, and Andrew begin to fight back.
  * :17 Kevin makes the first goal.
  * :09 Neil ties the game.
  * :05 Dan’s kissing Matt, oblivious, uncaring of the world around her. Bc _godamnit_ she had a wonderful season with the Foxes, with her family.
  * :04 Andrew has the ball.
  * :03 He shoots straight for the opposite goal.
  * :02 He misses, it bounces off the goal -
  * :01 Straight into Kevin’s racquet.
  * :00 The goal lights up red.




	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The one where Neil walks in on Andrew having a bit of a breakdown.

Years later

  * Andrew’s ok
    * he’s happy with Neil 
    * he’s comfortable
    * and one day
    * he realizes it
    * he’s ok.
    * he’s safe.
    * he has his Neil 
  * and that throws him into an anxiety attack
  * bc 
  * he’s never felt like this
  * he’s never had that security
  * he can be vulnerable
  * and Neil won’t think him weak 
  * and that makes his vision blur 
  * and when Neil walks into their apartment a few minutes later
    * Andrew’s standing just outside the kitchen 
    * and just
    * staring off
    * his breaths gasping 
    * and his eyes watering
  * and when Neil calls his name from the doorway
  * Andrew’s lip trembles
  * and he feels too hot 
  * but it’s Neil
    * Neil walks up to him and he’s hesitant
    * he stops right in front of Andrew 
    * and he waits for Andrew to acknowledge him 
    * then he really softly asks “yes or no?”
    * and 
    * a tear rolls down Andrew’s cheek when he says yes as he collapses into Neil’s arms 
      * (and then Neil holds him like he’s never letting go)
      * (and that just serves to make Andrew’s heart throb painfully)
      * (bc)
      * (bc that’s not hate he’s feeling) 
      * ( ~~that’s not hate~~ ) 




	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanahaki disease and Andriel short

Andrew hacked up a lung and white flower petals in the morning **  
**

Andrew left the classroom and half-ran to the nearest bathroom to heave pink petals.

Andrew grit his teeth as he unwillingly coughed up a white petal during practice.

Andrew was so sick of the petals, but he wasn’t about to do anything to remedy them. He was never going to let Neil Josten know that he was in love with him. Neil didn’t need to know and Andrew was content to wait until his feelings for this _side-effect_ passed.

But they didn’t pass.

Neil was not a side-effect of the drugs.

Neil Josten was the realest thing in Andrew’s life.

_\---_

_“You hate me, remember?”_

_“Every inch of you. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you.”_

_“…You like me.”_

_“I hate you.”_

\---

Andrew’s hands clenched as he coughed up more pink petals. This was getting ridiculous. Neil was never going to feel the same way. Andrew had told Neil the truth and that was all he was going to get.

But something had changed. Andrew stopped leaving class unexpectedly, he coughed up less petals. It was a relief after the months of this disease. It didn’t mean his feelings were passing because he still felt the same about Neil as he had before. Maybe he was just getting over the illness, even that’s not how it worked. But then again nothing ever went the way it was supposed to, in Andrew’s experience.

And one day, it just stopped. No more coughing. No more petals. Andrew wasn’t sure when it had ended. He had been at practice when he realized it had been two days since the last time he’d seen any petals. He thought back to the last week - nothing had changed. Neil was still Neil. He hadn’t said anything, hadn’t done anything.

\---

_“Yes or no?”_

Andrew was never going to tell Neil how he felt.

“ _Yes_.”

But maybe he never needed to.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil's neck fetish hc's

  * Andrew can’t believe how fixated this kid gets on his neck and collarbone
  * He almost always has a necklace of hickeys
  * This is getting ridiculous, Neil.
  * Neil loves to worship Andrew’s neck, he uses his teeth, yes, but he also does that thing where he covers his teeth with his lips then pulls and kneads at Andrew’s clavicle
  * It kills Andrew
  * Neil’s literally had Andrew shaking without even touching anything but his neck
  * Andrew fucking hates him
  * But also Neil likes traveling up Andrew’s neck to his ears and lets be real, Andrew’s ears are the most sensitive
  * Neil could be breathing hard near Andrew’s ears and Andrew’d die
  * Forget about Neil using the tip of his tongue to trace the outside of Andrew’s earlobe
  * Neil loves doing this to wake Andrew up in the morning especially (way down the line, don’t worry)
  * Andrew’s usually just sleeping soundly and Neil’ll start grazing Andrew’s earlobe, his breathing steady, but then as he starts coming to, his breathing speeds up a fraction and he’ll wake as soon as his breath hitches 
  * ~~I love death and dying~~
  * Neil nuzzles Andrew’s neck like a cat when they cuddle, he uses the top of his head to knead the way a cat does and everything 
  * His hair usually tickles too much for Andrew to keep it up, but Neil has def fallen asleep like this  
  * Neil’s neck is the most sensitive - Andrew makes sure to exploit it just as much as Neil does him 




	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: It seems that everyone who does an amnesia setting for Andreil has Andrew as the amnesiac but what if it was Neil? And Neil forgot everything up until like a week prior to his mother's death. Like even just the beginning would hurt because he'd wake up in a hospital and that's a huge no. With new scars. Without his mother's guidance. With a name she'd frown on because the surname "Josten" is too memorable. Please consider this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Post-Baltimore, The Foxes come to the Hospital instead of Neil going to the Hotel

The harsh lights and sterile smell of the room had Neil waking in a panic. He tried to move his arms but the IVs were preventing him from doing so. “Mom!” He had to find her.  
“Ne-”  
_“Don’t look back.”  
_ He yanked at the tubes. “Mum!” Why wasn’t she near him? This wasn’t like her.  
“Neil -”  
_“Don’t slow down.”  
_ His face felt weird, as if there was tape all around it. He brought up a hand to touch it, but his bandaged hand came to view first. “Mom!?” Where was she?  
“Abram.”  
_“Don’t trust anyone.”_

Neil’s eyes zeroed in on a blonde boy, shorter than him. His expression unreadable, almost too closed off, so no one could tell what he was feeling. Neil had to think for a moment before placing a name to the face - Andrew Minyard. Foxes. Palmetto State. They’d been on the news recently. Something about a suicide attempt by a new recruit. It was Andrew that had called him by his middle name.  
His real middle name.  
_Be anyone but yourself._  
“How do you -” Neil broke off. They weren’t alone. His eyes scanned the  room full of people - full of Foxes - lingering a second too long on an all too familiar face, but before Kevin could react Neil had turned back to Andrew.  
“How do you know that name?”   
“It’s your name.”  
Neil wracked his brain. Washington, his mom, Seattle, his dad, Adam - “My name is Adam Foster.”

“Neil-” Wymack started. Neil recoiled from the older man. Wymack watched helplessly as no recognition passed Neil’s face.  
“Why did you call me Abram?” Neil demanded of Andrew.  
“It’s your name.” Andrew cut in again.  
_Never be anyone for too long._  
“My name, My name is Adam Foster. My mother, she was with me, she has brown hair, shorter than me, have you seen her?”

“Neil-” Dan tried to break the news softly.  
Matt broke in, “What’s the last thing you remember?”  
Neil had to think a moment too long “Washington. That’s all.” They’d been on the run from his father but he wasn’t about to tell them that.

They were all looking at him in sympathy. Neil didn’t need their sympathy, he needed his mother and to get out of this damn hospital. “Where is she.” He was struggling, taking out the IV, kicking off the sheets, looking for his sneakers, getting ready to run.

“She’s dead, Josten.” It was Andrew again.  
Neil’s vision tunneled, his ears ringing. “Excuse me?”  
“You’re name is Neil Josten.  
“That’s not - I - You -”  
“Dead.”  
Renee placed a hand on Andrew’s shoulder, he let out a puff of breath before letting Dan continue.

“Neil. You’ve been in a pretty bad accident. You father -” Neil recoiled hard enough to pull a few stitches this time. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry - I didn’t mean -”  
Matt moved in front of Dan and took up the post of explaining what had happened. “We were at an away game when we lost you, your father’s people kidnapped you. Your uncle took care of him. You’re safe.”

“For how long?”  
“How long what?”  
“How long has she been gone?”  
“A year.”  
Neil felt like there was a weight crushing his chest, making it difficult to draw breath. A year. He’d lost - a year.

“How - How do, Why are you all here?”  
“Neil, don’t you remember any of us?” Nicky asked gently.  
“I - You’re Andrew,” Neil said, “you’ve been on the news, along with him - Kevin Day.”

“Neil -” Dan started again, “We know. We know everything. Kevin told us, Andrew knew most of it. But - you don’t have to hide. We’re your family.”  
“I don’t know you.”  
“Maybe not, but you did. You did at one point, and you trusted us. You can learn to again.  
“You don’t know me.”  
“Yes we do.”   
“We know if we asked you how you were right now, you’d answer ‘I’m fine.’” Kevin said.   
“We know that you care more about Exy than is healthy.” Nicky interjected   
“We know that your mom died and you had a shitty past with a shitty dad. But none of that matters. They’re gone. You have us.”  Matt finished. 

Neil didn’t know these people. He didn’t know their names or their stories. But he did know that they felt like home. They felt like family, And Neil didn’t know if it was the drugs they had him on, but he thought, that maybe he didn’t mind having a family to come home to after all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Foxhole Court as High School Musical AU.

  * The Foxes. Are. I - fuck. They’re the Wildcats. The Foxes are Wildcats. They’re…gosh. A coed, basketball team playing for Palmetto State. 
  * Neil is the new kid that joins the team two months into his freshman year
  * Coach Wymack and his son Kevin Day, team captain that plays Center
  * Alongside Kevin, Matt Boyd and Nicky Hemmick 
  * Forwards Neil Josten, Allison Reynolds, and Dan Wilds 
  * Guards Renee Walker, Aaron, and Andrew Minyard 
  * Neil’s pretty good, but Kevin knows he can do better, and so they train like hell, but Kevin doesn’t know this kid can also sing 
  * And so auditions open up and Neil’s like !?!? 
  * Andrew auditions with him _bc Neil asks.  
_
  * They’re up against siblings ( ~~im going to hell~~ ) Riko and Ichirou Moriyama, who have been waiting their whole lives for this moment
  * Usurped by these two jocks that haven’t taken a single voice lesson their entire lives 
  * The Foxes make finals against the USC Trojans, while Neil and Andrew are also in the musical 
  * So chaos ensues 
  * Jeremy and Jean are in on it
  * Wymack has no clue
  * Allison and Jeremy cut the power when they’re benched
  * Jean and Matt get into a pseudo fight to distract everyone 
  * Kevin read up on rules and regulations to make sure Neil and Andrew would have enough time 
  * The whole team and Trojans team come to watch Neil and Andrew “Break Free” 
  * I’m dying Tia I can’t believe I wrote this with my own two hands 
  * WHAT TEAM!?  
THE FOXES!  
WHAT TEAM!?  
THE FOXES!  
THE FOXES!   
GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME - and out of the goddamn gutter pls 




	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anybody wanna talk about Dark!Neil?

  * I don’t mean Raven!Neil, I’ll get to him eventually, but I mean Neil if Neil grew up into what his mother and father raised him to be
  * The Butchers son, on the run with his mother - but a Neil that didn’t choose kindness and mercy but instead embraced his fathers lethality and his mothers ruthlessness
  * The Neil that would’ve shown up at PSU and see Kevin Day and made him remember Nathaniel Wesninski
  * The Neil that had no reservations from killing people that got in his way, that didn’t care whether or not the Foxes lived if he stepped out of line
  * The Neil that Andrew would’ve clashed with bc he was a danger to Kevin,
  * He was a beacon and Andrew’d swore to protect Kevin before anything else.
  * The Neil that doesn’t get along with the Foxes or Wymack, that ~~still~~ sneers in Riko’s face, that doesn’t care for the Moriyama’s
  * The Neil whose Exy addiction is just as bad as our Neil’s
  * The Neil whose first instinct isn’t running from, but towards, the trouble
  * The Neil that doesn’t care about the carnage and destruction his presence leaves
  * A Neil that…realizes there is no reason to run from who he is.
  * A Neil that grows up to be the son his father always wanted, a man as ruthless as he, to carry on the Wesninski’s legacy
  * A Neil that was never Neil Josten for longer than was convenient
  * A Neil that well and truly was Nathaniel Wesninksi, through and through
  * A Neil that makes an enemy of Andrew Minyard
  * A Neil that will never have the stability and family that our Neil found.
  * A Neil that stops running from his father, doesn’t get kidnapped, but instead decides to go back to the life his mother so desperately didn’t want for him.
  * The Neil, Neil knows he could have turned out to be, had he not chosen kindness and compassion and instead the cruelty and abuse that was afforded to him as a child




	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Which one of them (Andreil) would be the person to steal the other's phone and which one would be the one to deal with the aftermath?

~~this is so long im so sorry~~

  * Andrew takes Neil’s phone
  * But see, it’s not just for kicks, this kid has a plan, he’s already placed certain bets with the rest of the Foxes long before he takes Neil’s phone
  * The two have similar phones so it’s easy enough to switch his for Neil’s in the morning. Andrew makes sure his is dead so Neil can’t get into it anyway.
  * Nicky and Matt and Dan and Allison and even Renee’s texts keep coming in to Neil’s (Now Andrew’s) phone and a gc with the upperclassmen along with Kevin’s reminders for practice have Andrew murderous
  * So Andrew has Neil’s phone and he texts everyone normally at first so everyone is under the impression that it’s Neil
  * He replies to “ _How are you?_ ”s with “ _I’m fine_.”s
  * And “ _What’s up?_ ”s with “ _In xyz class_.” bc obv Andrew has Neil’s schedule memorized bc he’s a fucking nerd
  * And then it starts
  * Andrew takes a pic of random attractive people and sends one to each of the foxes like
  * “ _Damn, they’re hot, I’d tap that_.”
  * And everyone’s like
  * Oh my god
  * Neil
  * Wtf are you doing
  * What do you mean
  * What does this mean
  * Nicky’s screaming
  * Matts worried
  * Dan’s being a mother
  * Allison’s like same babe, same
  * Renee asks if Andrew and he’d fought like the sweetheart she is
  * Aaron doesn’t respond, but texts Andrew a “ _Shut your bf up_ ” ~~BC HE CARES AND DOESN’T WANT NEIL TO HURT HIS BROTHER OK~~ which Andrew doesn’t know about until much later bc he desn’t have his phone
  * Kevin tells Neil to concentrate in class so he can practice more
  * Andrew doesn’t respond to any of the texts after sending the pictures
  * ~~fucking nerd  
~~
  * ~~i hate them all oh my god~~
  * But bc no one else is in his year and everyone has different classes they cant talk to the real Neil until practice the next morning
  * …but no one wants to say anything in front of Andrew
  * Andrew’s fucking dying
  * He acts like Neil and he fought big time, like they p much broke up
  * and everyones freaking out
  * and Neil, like the oblivious babe he is, is like…ok? Andrew’s being weird, but ok.
  * Andrew doesn’t stop there
  * He legit goes “I’m sorry Neil.” loud enough for Matt to hear.
  * “I didn’t mean it.” loud enough for Nicky to hear.
  * and Neil’s so fucking confused, but Exy, so he goes “We’ll talk after practice.” to placate Andrew
  * Andrew almost feels sorry, Neil is way to easy to prank
  * Everyone thinks this is it
  * Andrei have broken up
  * Money starts changing hands, all the bets, along the lines of Neil would sleep with anyone else, Neil would never leave Andrew, Andreil was going to be endgame, Andreil would make it to 80, Andreil would never break up
  * Every single one of them bet high bc they had faith in Neil
  * Anyway
  * Neil’s ignoring Andrew till after practice like he said and Andrew’s purposeley following him around with a dejected look on his face and Renee is collecting everyones money to give to Andrew
  * bc omg is this really happening
  * Andreil is breaking up
  * Andrew pockets the money ~~such a lil shit oh my god~~ and gets out of there as soon as practice is over
  * The Foxes corner Neil later and ask what the actual fuck happened
  * and Neil’s like wtf are y’all taking about
  * and they’re all like the texts? Kayla from History?
  * Adam from Stat? What the fuck what that?
  * and Neil, bless him, is so confused
  * and they’re like wtf
  * and he’s like wtf
  * and then he’s like “My phone’s been dead all day, which is weird, because I remember charging it all n- oh….”
  * No one gets their money back  




	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt where Neil hides a British accent from the foxes to hides his identity but when he comes to the hotel after the Baltimore thing he lets it out and their all like the fuck

In which Neil Josten is the son of Nathan “The Butcher” Wesninski and Mary Hatford, Mob Boss of The Hatford Family - an AU. 

  * The Hatford’s are to the UK what the Moriyama’s are in the US. Making Neil’s significance that of Ichirou Moriyama, Mary’s to Kengo. and Stuart’s to Tetsuji. 
  * Nathan is not aware of said significance when Mary marries him, she was undercover, running away with Neil was always part of the plan.
  * Dying in California was not. 
  * Neil knows. Mary had told him everything, her family, his significance, their power, their empire. 
  * She dies, and leaves him with this legacy, that no one but Stuart now knows of, bc no one knew that Mary had a son, except for Stuart. 
  * So Neil, being in the US, away from the Hatford’s, with his father on his tail, decides that it’s best to never mention to anyone who he really is
  * The Hatford part of him is who Neil really identifies with, bc they aren’t like the Moriyama’s or the Wesninski’s, they don’t kill for sport, they’re well-respected, not feared.
  * So PSU, the Foxes, Baltimore - happens. 
  * And Neil makes the conscious decision to switch back to his native accent, one he hadn’t used in too long. He’s just so tired of hiding, he’s found his family and if that means his identity needs to be known, then so be it. 
  * The entirety of the hotel room just…stops. Like, he’s busted up pretty bad, but it’s still Neil, why is he talking like that? 
  * Dan’s the one who says something about his accent first
  * Neil’s so tired of running
  * He takes a deep breath and just let’s it all out, his story, his family, his mother, the Hatford’s, Stuart, the Moriyama’s, all of it 
  * Kevin’s bout to have a heart attack 
  * Andrew refused to even look at him for all of 2 minutes after Neil was done explaining. 
  * Matt’s prob crying 
  * Nicky’s def crying 
  * And yeah
  * The Moriyama’s don’t have the control they thought they did over Neil once the news spreads
  * Stuart offers to take him back home, but Neil stays
  * Neil stays.
  * Neil “Hatford” Josten is who he is, and after enough time, he steps down and offers Stuart his position in the family, which Stuart doesn’t take initially, not wanting to take that away from Neil
  * But Neil has more reason to stay in the US than the UK anyway 
  * He’s happy where he is, with the people that he is, and he wouldn’t have it any other way




	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That time Andreil go on a date, Neil makes a pun, and Andrew laughs.

It’s years down the line, Andreil are on a date

  * It’s not a big deal at this point, they go out to dinner whenever they get a chance, still playing for different teams. 
  * They go out for Italian bc it’s Neil’s favorite and/or bc they haven’t had Italian in a long time 
  * Andrew gets five cheese ziti and Neil gets a caesar salad bc he’s a nerd 
  * They’re enjoying their meal, sharing stories of their respective teams, the Foxes, their lives in general
  * Andrew starts glaring at his plate at one point, stopping what he was saying mid-sentence, “…so I told him -”
  * Neil raises a brow in confusion, asks, “Everything’s ok?” 
  * Andrew just gestures to his plate where there is one piece of fusilli instead of the ziti that was supposed to be in his plate
  * Neil scoffs, he reaches a across the table and stabs the offending piece and goes, “I guess you could call it, an - impasta.” 
  * He pops it in his mouth and grins at his pun
  * Andrew
  * Andrew snorts in surprise, letting out the smallest laugh, before biting his tongue bc _that was…weird_
  * Neil is staring in wonder, bc that was at once, the most adorable and the most heartbreaking sound he’d ever heard. Andrew laughed ~~(it was a different laugh, not one laced with mania, all Andrew and none of the drugs, one Neil hadn’t ever heard~~ ) at a joke Neil made, but stopped abruptly bc he was so unfamilar with the feeling
  * Neil swallows his bite, smiling gently, prodding Andrew to continue his story about a fan he ran into at a gas station
  * Andrew clears his throat and does
  * But the memory is forever ingrained in both their minds as the first time Andrew truly laughed  




	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time King Fluffkins wins.

Some fluff bc I think we all need some cheering up 

  * It’s like 2 in the morning, Neil stirs bc he hears Andrew murmuring from the kitchen, he cracks an eye open to see the light streaming in from under the door
  * He rolls out of bed and pads out of their room
  * Andrew’s rummaging around their cupboards before their dishwasher squeaks open 
  * He’s muttering something to himself, Neil can’t make anything out from where he is in the hallway
  * Then 
  * “DID I SAY YOU WERE ALLOWED UP HERE!?” 
  * Neil jumped, the words not registering, just the fact that Andrew was yelling, and ran the rest of the way to the kitchen, his heart in his throat
  * King Fluffkins is on the counter by the sink, locked in a staring contest with Andrew who has one hand on the dishwasher’s handle and a green mug in the other
  * Sir Fat Cat McCatterson is rubbing Andrew’s ankles vigorously
  * He turned and meowed a few times at Neil when Neil skid in ~~(the cat not Andrew doofus)~~
  * Andrew turns when Sir Fat Cat meowed, his shoulders slump
  * “Go back to sleep, sorry for waking you.”
  * Neil may or may not be coming off an adrenaline high after realizing Andrew was not in danger. 
  * Now Neil’s biting his tongue to keep in the giggles. 
  * Andrew notices
  * Look, Andrew doesn’t blush, but if Andrew did blush, and I’m not saying he does, but _if he did_ , then Andrew’d totally be blushing just slightly rn
  * Neil’s eyes are watering at this point, he lets out a breathless laugh
  * _oh my god you’re adorable_
  * lol which one of them thought that? Neil? Andrew? Both? Neither? Who knows? 
  * Andrew tries to scowl, but Neil’s laugh doesn’t let that happen 
  * He makes himself his hot chocolate and Neil goes back to sleep soon after
  * King won that night




	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time Andrew's getting a massage that doesn't end as expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for rape mention, trauma, also slightly nsfw

Neil is sitting on Andrew’s back

  * It’s after a game, Neil’s giving Andrew a massage
  * It was a rough game, against the Trojans 
  * Andrew hadn’t realized how bad he was until it was a struggle to get his helmet off
  * Neil had to help him get his uniform off 
  * *cue shower where Neil got to return the favor Andrew’d afforded him way back when*
  * anyway
  * Andrew’s lying on his stomach, everyone else is out or asleep, no one’s in their room 
  * Neil’s sitting on him, his hands working the muscles of Andrew’s  ~~toned~~ back 
  * It’s been an hour the kinks and knots are all out Neil what are you still doing 
  * Andrew’s relaxed and halfway between aroused and asleep 
  * Neil’s hands aren’t massaging as hard and Andrew’s reveling in the feel of Neil’s hands softly kneading his back and shoulders and _neck_  
  * And he’s on the verge of sleep, pretty much unconscious when he moans
  * Neil’s heard Andrew moan before, but he was always more…aware 
  * But this time it was subconsciously, unaware of his surroundings, and thrown into a reflex reaction to making noise 
  * He flinches as soon as the moan escapes his lips, enough to have bitten his tongue hard enough to bleed 
  * A furiously whispered “ _I’m sorry!_ ” passes his lips before his hands come up around his head, his mouth sealed shut 
  * _~~he’ll be quiet, he won’t make any noise, he didn’t mean to, he’s sorry, he’ll be good, please, please, please~~_
  * He’s…cowering 
  * Neil is frozen, not breathing, his mind not working fast enough to catch up, his hands unmoving, but still touching Andrew
  * He hears a muffled “ _please…_ ” against the pillows
  * Neil lets out the breath he’d been holding softly, and gently moves off Andrew, and waits for Andrew to untense 
  * Andrew comes to a moment later, when he doesn’t feel the weight of a body behind him 
  * He takes a few shuddering breaths and turns his head, his bloodshot eyes focusing on Neil 
  * He blinks away the remnants of the flashback, of the ghost of unwanted touch and rough hands over his mouth 
  * Neil is staring, not in pity, not in sympathy, rather in understanding and acceptance
  * Andrew waits for him to apologize, like he knows he will, but Neil doesn’t bc he knows Andrew doesn’t want to hear an apology for nothing he did 
  * Andrew takes another hitching breath, he rolls over to his side of the bed, motioning for Neil to get in as well
  * Andrew knows that Neil means every stupid “always” and will always respect his “No”s and love him, no matter how fucked up he believes he is, no matter what
  * Neil turns off the lights and falls asleep next to Andrew




	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew's apathy isn't a character flaw.

Kinda sad sorry

Kinda also done with people erasing Andrew’s apathy, at least, early on in Andreil’s relationship

  * Neil needs Andrew to defend the goal
  * And Andrew does! V well too, but Neil knows if Andrew would just… _want_ it, then he’d be even better 
  * So he asks him to play like he means it, like he’s passionate about it, like he _cares_
  * “I don’t care.”   
“I know, babe, but just -”  
“No.”  
“…No?”  
“I don’t- I, don’t - care.”  
“Come on, ‘Drew -”   
“I can’t. I - listen to me. I can’t - care.” 
  * Neil can feel his heart shattering
  * He’s aware that Andrew isn’t like most, he knows Andrew is apathetic, and he knows that it’s not an act or a front that Andrew keeps up for appearances
  * Neil knows this. 
  * But sometimes - sometimes he wants Andrew to know how it feels like to want something really badly, to care, to feel
  * And yeah, sometimes he forgets, or isn’t as mindful as he should be
  * Andrew’s not mad at him
  * But Andrew can’t care either.
  * Neil doesn’t ask him about playing like he cares again 
  * And at some point
  * “I, I’m sorry. I just- I want to. I do. But -”  
“Hey, it’s ok.”  
“No, no. I, I am unable to care about this thing. I’m sorry - please.”
  * It’s always serious when Andrew uses please
  * They work on it, like they always do
  * And no, maybe it won’t ever be really, fully ok, but Andrew’s trying
  * But erasing his apathy would be erasing a fundamental part of what makes Andrew Andrew. 




	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: can you write something with Raven!neil. I don’t care if you write it with him growing up as a raven or him having to transfer there due to Riko. Your writing is amazing!! Thank you

  * Neil Josten never has and never will exist, and neither will any of the other personas his mother thought up, she dies in a car accident a year after he moves to The Nest 
  * There will be no future for the Palmetto State Foxes, they become a Division II school and the rest is history
  * Kevin Day will never get out of the Ravens, he never even finds out who his father was
  * Jean Moreau will suffer longer and harder still, not even Renee Walker can get him out of the hellhole he’s managed to find himself in
  * Nathaniel “Nate” Wesninski will take his #2 spot after Riko Moriyama, leaving Kevin Day with #3, and #4 will fall to none other than Andrew “A.J.” Minyard. 
  * The ruthlessness of their game rivals no one, The perfect Backliner, Strikers, and Goalie set played as if they could read each others minds, the Ravens don’t lose a Championship for the 6 years it takes for all of The Four to graduate 
  * Kevin and Thea do end up together after they both graduate, have a daughter that they have no choice but to give to the Moriyama family as soon as she shows potential the Ravens hadn’t seen since The Four graduated 
  * A.J. decides that life isn’t worth living, even after he gets offered a spot on Court with his old teammates 
  * Nate spends his time off court with a myriad of one night stands, never staying long enough to remember their names
  * Nate doesn’t miss a life outside of the one he leads, only bc this is the only life he has ever known, he has more money than he knows what to do with and enough Exy to satisfy his addiction, but no friends to call his own. 




	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Andrew's a kindergarten teacher.

Sit down children lemme tell y’all about kindergarten teacher!Andrew “Mr. Andrew” Minyard-Josten 

Do you hear that? That’s the sound of my heart pounding as I contemplate Andrew smiling at his kids’ work.

  * He never lies to them, he’ll criticize when he has to, but he’ll do it such a way that the kid is left feeling proud of what they have and a smile promising that next time they’ll do better
  * He encourages and compliments and makes sure that his kids are doing ok, not just academically, but physically and emotionally as well
  * He wears his armbands, but not his knives, and yeah, sometimes his kids get a glimpse of his scars, but they respond with the most innocent, pure reactions that it brings Andrew to near-tears 
  * They call him Mr. Andrew bc Mr. Minyard-Josten was a mouthful and he’d rather not be called Minyard anyway
  * He keeps the drawings his kids give him and puts them on the refrigerator at home 
  * He keeps bandages and lollipops on him at all times just in case, 5 year olds end up with more random cuts and scrapes on the playground than he’d anticipated 
  * He stays after school until every single one of his students is picked up, he knows who’s supposed to be picking them up and if there’s ever someone different they know to bring a note from the office saying they’re picking up that kid that day 
  * He works with his kids to help them learn, he doesn’t talk at them and expect them to understand, he is sensitive and fragile and kind and compassionate with his kids 
  * Neil sometimes picks him up from work bc he wants to, he’ll walk to the class and lean against the doorjamb until the kids yell “Mr. Neil!” then he grins and asks them if Mr. Andrew was behaving
  * Neil’s walked in on multiple group hugs, where Andrew is standing with all these little children that come up to his stomach hugging him, and Andrew smiling in exasperation at their antics
  * Andrew loves rewarding his kids, but not enough to spoil them, just so they know to work hard and that Mr. Andrew would be proud of them when they did a good job 
  * On Parents Night all of the parents come in and ask where a Mr. Andrew would be, excited to meet their kid’s favorite teacher and Andrew loves watching them try to desperately school their features when he introduces himself as Mr. Andrew. He’s 5′ even. Give them a break. 
  * He teaches them songs to help memorize things, they sing along as a class, and Neil would never say, but sometimes Andrew’ll be doing the dishes or grading worksheets and he’ll be singing something about the months of the year or something about the planets
  * Paint. His kids love to paint, he has multiple pants that will never be one color again. He’s learned to wear an apron from then on, it’s white. Or it was white, now it has small handprints and paint smudges and pen marks and a few kids decided to write Mr. Andrew on it in marker, some kids wrote their own names and still others drew hearts and rainbows and smiley faces wherever they could. Andrew loves it and never washes it, just gets another when it becomes completely covered
  * Yes. If a kid comes in with a bruise that wasn’t there the day before, Andrew will do something about it as soon as he sees it 
  * This totally has nothing to do with Andreil becoming foster parents
  * Or adopting 
  * Not at all




	17. Chapter 17

It’s 4am 

  * somewhere on the east coast
  * Neil is sitting on the hood of the car, a beer in hand
  * Andrew’s standing with a cigarette next to him 
  * the radio’s on in the back ground
  * theres a city below them, lights blinking, a few cars on the road
  * the sky is still an hour from lightening 
  * the song changes and Neil starts humming along 
  * Andrew’s making a face at him
  * it was an old song
  * not one Andrew thought Neil’d know
  * one Neil didn’t think he’d know
  * but he’d heard it enough at gas stations and rest areas with his mother for it to have stuck
  * Andrew grounds his cigarette butt under his shoe and when he looks at Neil he’s got a look in his eyes and a smile that promises that whatever he’s thinking is gonna end in Andrew raising his percent
  * Neil slips off the hood and takes Andrew’s wrist and pulls him away from where he’s leaning against the car
  * and he starts swaying with the music 
  * Andrew’s unamused, he goes to move back to where he was
  * but Neil grabs his arms and pulls and pushes them back and forth making Andrew move
  * Andrew rolls his eyes and gains control of his own limbs 
  * Neil’s grinning 
  * theyre dancing, more swaying with Neil humming along to the song 
  * the song ends and the radio crackles with the early morning commute and weather update as Neil and Andrew turn to watch the stars  
  * Neil can’t see from where he his, but Andrew’s smiling just slightly 




	18. Chapter 18

Hear me out

  * Neil telling Andrew that he loves him, it’s not the first time, just the first time in front of an audience
  * They’re in the locker room, the Foxes are all there, Wymack and Abby aren’t
  * They just won a game, nothing important, just a normal Friday night
  * Neil’s watching Andrew bc he can and Andrew takes off his gloves and helmet, and his hair’s plastered to his head with sweat, and he’s not as happy as the Foxes, but Neil can tell he’s sort of smiling, in an Andrew way
  * And Neil doesn’t realize he’s said “I love you.” until the Foxes go silent and he looks around like ‘ _shit, did I say that out loud?_ ’
  * And then they’re all looking at Andrew and he just furrows his brows, then considers for a sec and then goes “200%”
  * And the Foxes all misunderstand, and Andrew doesn’t realize until Dan and Nicky are making “ _aww_ ” faces at them
  * Aaron looks uncomfortable, Renee and Allison are smiling, Matt’s grinning, Kevin’s trying ~~failing~~ to ignore them 
  * Neil’s torn between laughing and running bc Andrew’s gonna kill him for this 
  * He laughs anyway



 


	19. Chapter 19

listen

  * Kevin’s out of town with Wymack
  * Aaron and Nicky are in Columbia
  * The Upperclassmen are away for the weekend 
  * Andrew and Neil are left to their own devices
  * The Foxes are the only ones keeping the both of them from doing the stupidest shit 
  * Neil took the Maserati to get a new paint job, flames anyone?
  * Andrew cut up Aaron’s wardrobe 
  * Neil gets a call from Andrew, he needs paint 
  * They paint the whole dorm’s ceiling black 
  * Neil bakes some cookies
  * The kitchen looks like a flour bomb had gone off
    * A flour bomb had gone off. 
      * _“What the fuck Andrew!?”_
  * Andrew adopts 2 puppies
  * Aaron walks in. 
  * Neil’s got flour in his hair and paint all over his clothes
  * There’s two puppies covered in flour running around the kitchen
  * Andrew has paint and flour everywhere and a pair of scissors in one hand 
  * Aaron walks out.




	20. Chapter 20

K but listen

  * Neil getting hella mad at Andrew for some reason, they had a disagreement, they argued, what have you
  * They end the argument on Andrew yelling that he hates Neil 110%
  * Neil not looking at or talking to Andrew and Andrew getting more and more stubborn until neither of them have talked in a week 
  * Practice is hell
  * Neil’s sleeping on Matt’s couch
  * No one’s saying anything bc nobody’s got a death wish 
  * Then one day Neil’s talking game plans with Kevin and Dan 
  * And Andrew’s just 
  * Watching 
  * And he’s not sure why but Neil doesn’t look any different
  * And he’s not smiling or laughing or anything
  * Just
  * Talking about Exy, like he always is 
  * And Neil looks over, not expecting to meet Andrew’s eyes
  * And neither of them look away 
  * And after a second, Andrew just mouths 
  * ‘One oh nine percent’
  * And Neil just 
  * Stops
  * And then hIS LIPS UPTURN AND HE’S GRINNING 
  * and Andrew bites the inside of his lips to keep from smiling 
  * But he ain’t fooling anyone




	21. Chapter 21

Neil’s got a cold 

  * Andrew’s making his boyfriend soup, bc that’s just the kind of caring, loving, adoring - “Andrew please?” “I hate you.” 
  * So Andrew goes
  * and its like 5 minutes later
  * Neil hears sniffling
  * Its not loud, barely audible 
  * So he quietly, painstakingly goes to check on Andrew 
  * He sees Andrew standing at the island
  * His eyes are red 
  * He’s sniffling 
  * There are tears rolling down his face
  * He goes to wipe them with his sleeve
  * Then he notices Neil staring at him in shocked confusion 
  * He rolls his eyes and mutters something about French onion soup being Neil’s favorite 




	22. Chapter 22

Andrew waking up from nightmares

  * He wakes up and instantaneously freezes, he goes stiff and holds his breath until he becomes aware of his surroundings and realizes there’s no threat 
  * He tries to blink away the images burned into his eyelids, and the ghosts of unwanted hands
  * Then he’ll take a deep breath as quietly as he can so as not to wake Neil up 
  * Then he either goes back to sleep if he thinks he can
  * Otherwise he just stares at the ceiling until sunrise
  * Or he gets up for a smoke
  * Or a shower
  * Or hot chocolate 
  * He never, he’s never woken up screaming, the closest thing he’s come to making an audible noise is gasping just loud enough for Neil to stir
  * If, if he can’t wake up, he starts thrashing, which are the worst nightmares
  * The thrashing always wakes Neil, so these are the only ones he’s privy to
  * Night/right after a nightmare is when Andrew feels the most vulnerable
  * He’ll be fine in the morning
  * But the fear that over takes him during these episodes is enough for Neil to want to raze the world to kill the people responsible for making Andrew look and feel the way he does 



* * *

 

Neil waking up from nightmares

  * He tries his hardest not to wake Andrew when he has nightmares, but as light a sleeper Neil is, Andrew is more so, he gives up on it after a few months of sleeping in the same bed 
  * He usually wakes up with a gasp, his scars throbbing, heartbeat thudding against his ears
  * Neil tosses in his sleep when he’s having a nightmare right before waking up, so Andrew usually wakes up before Neil fully does
  * He mutters - words, phrases, names. 
  * Andrew clenches his jaw so hard at every muffled “ _Please.”_ it’s a wonder his gums don’t bleed
  * Once he does wake, he sits up, knowing he won’t be waking Andrew up bc he’s already woken him up
  * Or they both get up and drink a cup of decaf
  * Or they watch some TV
  * Or (t)he(y) take(s)a shower
  * Or he falls back asleep watching Andrew fall back asleep 
  * He once was halfway to the bathroom before being fully awake, one hand over his mouth, the other splayed across his stomach 
  * He’s woken up screaming, scaring Andrew half to death
  * Andrew’s hand on the back of his neck only works if Neil realizes he’s safe
  * So the first time Neil woke up with a yell, Andrew acted on impulse, and clamped his hand on Neil’s neck, but that just threw Neil into a full on panic attack 
  * Andrew still hasn’t forgiven himself for that one 




	23. Chapter 23

After the girls and Matt graduate 

  * Our Foxes are spending a few days together
  * They go to some island that Allison’s parents own
  * And they’re sitting around a fire, and just relaxing and catching up, telling stories and laughing
  * And then Matt ropes Neil into reenacting his proposal to Dan (they’re drunk, give ‘em a break) 
  * And Andrew, he was already half-smiling, watching Neil
  * But now, he lets out the gentlest scoff
  * And Neil doesn’t really pay any mind, bc he’s heard it before
  * But the rest of them 
  * Pause
  * Bc…did Andrew just… _laugh_? 
  * Like the whole trip they noticed that he was almost, just a little bit more
  * Softer, than he used to be
  * But 
  * The sound was so foreign 
  * A sound that they hadn’t heard, ever, without an undertone of mania
  * And Matt just stares wide-eyed 
  * Dan has a soft smile on her face
  * Allison’s smirking
  * Aaron’s squinting
  * Renee’s got tears in her eyes 
  * NIcky’s reaction is halfway between Matt and Renee’s 
  * Kevin rolled his eyes, but he can’t keep the smile off his face
  * And Andrew doesn’t care 
  * He doesn’t care what they think
  * Bc 
  * Bc Neil’s the only one that matters 




	24. Chapter 24

April Fools!

  * Matt and Dan blow up ALL the balloons, then strategically leave them in places.
    * They hide Kevin’s racquet in the equipment closet, which is full of balloons 
    * They get Nicky in on it, he unlocks the Maserati for them to completely fill it to the brim in pink and red balloons
  * Aaron tapes air horns behind all the doors, so when someone opens a door all the way it goes off
  * Renee and Allison peel onions and dip them in caramel and hand them out. No one suspects it. It’s beautiful when Matt just tears into one and starts chewing in earnest. Caramel apples are his _fav_
  * Kevin cancels practice 
    * Wymack’s in on it
    * The Foxes still show up like the nerds they are 
  * Wymack and Abby sit on a few swivel chairs that have air horns under them
    * Wymack almost had a heart attack
    * Abby was up and ready to fight as soon as hers went off
    * No one fesses to putting them there
    * (It was Bee) 
  * Nicky changed all the contacts in Neil’s phone to “Andrew” 
  * Aaron got Neil to grab Andrew’s pack and replaced his cigarettes with candy cigarettes 
    * Andrew just pulls out another pack
    * Not before trying to light a stick of sugar 
      * Aaron’s howling 
      * Neil’s grinning 
    * He’s a sucker for candy anyway, it’s not like he’s not complaining 
  * Dan bakes cupcakes
    * And frosts them with mayonnaise mixed with red food coloring
    * Nicky you idiot. 
  * Neil doesn’t get the point! 
    * Neither does Andrew
    * Doesn’t stop either of them from replacing all the cream in 2 packs of Oreos with toothpaste 
    * Nicky shoved 3 in his mouth when Neil offered 
    * Instant regret thy name is Nicky Hemmick



 


	25. Chapter 25

Andrew panics

  * They’re on the roof, like they are most nights
  * and Neil, not-afraid-of-heights Josten decides to stand on the ledge
  * and Andrew looks over and when he realizes what Neil’s doing he just
  * Freezes
  * And he’s like inner monologuing like goddamnit Neil im gonna fucking kill you you get off the ledge right this second or so help me i will never speak to you ag- 
  * Neil stumbles
  * And Andrew snatches his arm and just
  * pulls, as hard as he can
  * And Neil tumbles onto him
  * and they both fall
  * and Andrew’s just
  * breathing heavy, even though he wasnt the one on the ledge
  * and Neil realizes
  * Andrew was afraid for him
  * he kisses Andrew in apology
  * and Andrew pushes him off and doesn’t speak to him for a few days
  * needless to say
  * Neil’s never done that again 




	26. Chapter 26

_[When Andrew graduates and moves on, he and Bee keep in touch, phone calls and messaging and face-chat programs a la Facetime and Skype.](http://korakos.tumblr.com/post/126432607217/what-is-it-about-betsy-that-actually-gets-andrews) _

  * Bee and Neil are p much the only people Andrew Facetime’s with
  * Sometimes he’ll catch up with Renee via Skype
  * Kevin, Aaron, and Nicky sometimes get regular phone calls, not very often video chats
    * Neil made him video chat Aaron when he and Katelyn announced that they were pregnant 
      * Aaron asked Neil to ask Andrew
        * Andrew would’ve done it if Aaron had asked 
          * But he didn’t 
            * I digress
  * With Bee 
    * Maybe he sits in one place and holds his phone out so she has his full attention
    * Maybe he puts his phone on the table where Bee would’ve sat and sits across from her
    * Maybe he takes her on walks with him
    * Maybe he gives her a tour of their apartment
    * He talks more about Neil more than anything or anyone else
      * Bee doesn’t mind
  * With Neil 
    * It’s usually more urgent
    * Bc the only reason he’s ever video chatting Neil is bc he/both of them are extremely busy 
      * Otherwise he’d/they’d make time to see each other in personn
    * So maybe it’s during practice 
    * Or just before/after a game
      * Imagine Andrew taking his phone out at half time to call Neil bc he misses him
      * anyway
    * Maybe they’re both staying at the apartment but Neil has a game (bc they were on separate teams at one point) 
      * Andrew calls him at half time 
        * in nothing but sweatpants, lying on their couch
        * Neil’s got helmet hair 
          * and he’s drenched in sweat
        * Andrew’s eating popcorn or skittles or something 
          * Neil’s pouting 
          * Andrew’s grinning
        * Andrew shows Neil their TV
          * He’s watching the game
            * Andrew never watches Exy
            * Andrew’s watching Exy
              * ~~asdfghjkl;~~
    * With Neil he’s usually all over the place
      * he doesn’t pay attention to where the camera’s facing
      * Bc he just wants to see Neil
        * Unless he can’t see Neil, then he’ll tell Neil so
      * But Neil also wants to see him 
        * But that usually means Neil’ll ask and it’ll go from not in the frame
        * to in the corner of the frame
          * Bc Andrew’s a lil shit
          * Neil still loves his lil shit
      * When Andrew has a second to breathe, Neil usually gets unnerved bc Andrew’s just staring at his phone, not even looking at his camera
        * Andrew’d tell him he wasn’t
        * or that he was just thinking
          * He was staring at Neil’s eyes
            * or lips
              * 786%




	27. Chapter 27

Jsut listen

  * A few years down the line Matt shows up at Neil’s door
  * And it not unusual 
  * They’re friends and they meet up from time to time 
  * But its been a while
  * What with Dan being pregnant and all
  * And
  * Matt comes in and they’re talking and catching up and his voice starts to crack
  * And Neil doesn’t know whats going on until Matt’s having a full blown panic attack
  * And he’s crying about not being a good enough dad
  * And how he doesn’t want to be like his father 
  * And how much he loves Dan and doesn’t wanna tell her any of this bc he doesnt think she’d understand 
  * And Neil
  * Neil just
  * Starts talking
  * Telling Matt about Nathan
  * And Matt, just listens, bc he knows what kind of person Nathan was but he’d never heard it from Neil 
  * And the more Neil talks, Matt wants to get angry at Nathan, but he’s more…in awe
  * bc
  * Neil’s not Nathan
  * It doesn’t matter if Neil doesnt have kids 
  * Neil will never be Nathan
  * And Matt understands 
  * And he goes home without a single doubt that he will be the best father he can be to his first son/daughter 




	28. Chapter 28

Nicky and Erik’s weddin g 

  * its in the states bc it is shh
  * Aaron and Andrew arguing over who gets to be Nicky’s best man
  * Nicky threatening to ask Neil if they dont stop
  * in the end Andrew gives in 
  * bc Neil asked
  * the Foxes are all invited
  * and ofc they all make it
  * even the newbs 
  * and it becomes like a high security event bc woah so many professional athletes and their famous significant others  
  * Erik’s parents dance with Nicky so he doesn’t feel too bad
  * it still sucks
  * but Nicky’s over it, and the smile on Erik’s face is enough 
  * Andrew and Aaron taking turns dancing with the grooms
  * Neil gets roped into dancing with Nicky at least once
  * idk where i was going with this just take it 




	29. Chapter 29

The Foxes go laser tagging 

  * Neil suggests it 
  * Everyone’s surprised, but Neil never got the chance to as a kid, and always wanted to try 
  * So they go
  * There’s 9 Foxes and Katelyn tags along to even them out, which is the only reason Andrew still comes 
  * It’s generated teams, so they can’t choose
  * Neil, Matt, Allison, Aaron, and Katelyn end up together on Team Red
  * Which leaves Andrew, Nicky, Dan, Renee, and Kevin on Blue 
  * Andrew doesn’t really take it seriously
  * Matt and Dan are arguing over who’s gonna win
  * Bets are already flying 
  * Neil wasn’t prepared.
  * Being shot at drives his anxiety up, but the familiar faces and voices help to ease some of it
  * His heart’s still pounding in his ears
  * Kevin notices that he’s having a rough time, so tries to help it the only way he knows how 
  * He taunts Neil, competing against him
  * And Andrew’s like, that’s the fucking point??
  * But then he notices Neil’s eyes and finally starts playing for real 
  * And soon it goes from friendly competiton to full out war
  * Neil’s concentrating too hard on winning to notice anything else
  * Matt’s covering him from the upper level
  * Neil’s ducking and somehow managing to roll away with the huge ass vest on 
  * Andrew’s being covered by Renee, Kevin by Nicky 
  * Katelyn’s supposed to be covering Aaron, but he ends up covering her as much as she is
  * Neil’s at Blue’s base, Dan is defending, Matt’s on her as well as he can be
  * Kevin at Red’s, Allison is defending, Nicky’s on her
  * Andrew’s trying to hit anyone and anything Red 
  * Aaron get’s the brunt of those 
  * They’re all drenched by the end
  * Blue wins 
  * Neil doesn’t care, he had fun and Andrew grinned when it was announced that Blue won, and that made it all worth it




	30. Chapter 30

consider days off

  * Its early morning and theyre both early risers
  * but before sunrise is too early for ANdrew
  * but Neil’s up and he doesn’t feel like going back to sleep
  * so he gets up lightly and Andrew’s still asleep
  * he takes a shower and comes back
  * but he managed to knock over his deodorant by accident 
  * and he closes the door to the bathroom quietly
  * but hes made enough noise to make Andrew stir
  * hes squinting at Neil, his eyes blurred with sleep
  * he cocks his head bc he’s too tired to form words
  * and Neil whispers sorry, go back to sleep
  * and Andrew’s blinking sleepily, and before he can help it he yawns 
  * and Neil’s gritting his teeth to keep from smiling 
  * but Andrew’s too out of it to notice anyway, he’s already half-asleep again
  * and Neil thinks it might be the sunlight filtering in
  * throwing shadows on their bed
  * but it almost looks like Andrew fell asleep with half a smile on his face




	31. Chapter 31

The trial

  * It’s canon that none of the Foxes but Nicky and Neil go, bc Aaron had p much forbade the rest from coming
  * Nicky and Neil and Andrew
  * And Andrew knows what’s coming 
  * but he hates it
  * he abhors it
  * he has to stand up there and tell his side
  * and Nicky’s crying loud enough to turn a few heads
  * and Andrew’s doing his best to ignore him
  * ANd Neil’s got a hand squeezing Nicky’s thigh
  * it’s all he’s got but Nicky is too distressed to notice
  * And tbh his grip on Nicky is prob helping Neil more than Nicky
  * And Cass 
  * Cass is there, and Aaron can’t look at her
  * And Andrew is refusing to acknowledge her
  * And Wymack and Bee and Abby 
  * And Bee’s crying silently 
  * And Abby had to leave
  * Andrew doesn’t care
  * He comes back, he sits next to Neil 
  * and he doesn’t say anything
  * but the empty look in his eyes is enough 




	32. Chapter 32

Headcannon that Andrew is not incapable of tears

  * He doesn’t cry in front of anyone, not Neil, not Bee, not Wymack. No one. 
  * But he cries
  * He cries after Wymack dies
  * He cries when Bee dies and most anniversaries of the day 
  * He cries when Neil runs his mouth and ends up in the hospital in an induced coma 
  * But never when someone could see or hear
  * In the bathroom of their apartment when Neil’s not home 
  * In his car in the early hours of the morning, when the sun hasn’t yet risen 
  * where the lane’s blur as the tears gather
  * If Neil’s near and he feels tears coming on, he’ll channel them to anger
  * He may be described as apathetic 
  * But he’s still human 




	33. Chapter 33

  * They’re fighting, arguing 
  * Neil’s angry, Andrew’s indifferent 
  * Which makes Neil even more angry 
  * And now he’s yelling 
  * And Andrew’s just staring at him, squinting slightly
  * And Neil doesn’t know if he’s even listening 
  * And Andrew tilts his head 
  * And Neil is furious
  * And Andrew
  * He starts to smile
  * And Neil pauses
  * Bc 
  * That’s different
  * He looks…happy 
  * And Neil’s anger just 
  * Dissipates 
  * And he’s just staring
  * Andrew’s lips are open just enough that his front teeth show 
  * He has dimples 
  * Neil’s already forgotten why he was mad in the first place 
  * Bc
  * _God, I love him._




	34. Chapter 34

Can we address Neil when he gets…scary?

  * There is no doubt in my mind that the Foxes become  _afraid_ when Neil gets a certain way 
  * His brows sharpen, his mouth quirks up in a smirk or scowl, he gets this look in his eyes that make their instincts scream _do not cross_
  * And yeah, sometimes Neil doesn’t notice he gets like that until he realizes Matt’s stepped in front of Dan or Nicky’s looking at him with wide eyes.
  * But I think, more often than not, he knows. 
  * He knows exactly the kind of presence he exudes, and he wants anyone that messes with his family to feel the utter lethality in his gaze.
  * The venom in his words usually does the trick, but if Andrew or Matt gets into trouble on or off the court, they can count on Neil to make sure the perpetrators will take one look at him and turn tail and run 
  * No one messes with Josten because of the rumors
  * And there are rumors, loads, of that kid from PSU that was sent to the hospital because he bullied Andrew, the player from New York that went missing, the player from California that quit Exy, the associate of Tetsuji that didn’t even see Neil coming, the news reporter that left the country, some of them true, others bullshit
  * But Neil’s not gonna confirm or deny them. 
  * Andrew wants people (Neil) to believe that it doesn’t bother him, but when he gets that way, even Andrew’s instincts are screaming at him to run away, no matter how much his brain knows Neil would never hurt him. 
  * Neil, Neil knows how to get under a person’s skin, without even knowing them, he knows pressure points, he can read people really well to tell their weaknesses, he knows how to make them squeamish without trying, he can knock people unconscious with minimal effort on his part, he knows where to cut for most pain and least damage. It impresses the Foxes as much as it scares them
  * Neil knows, accepts that this is just a part of who he is. Who he is underneath, underneath Neil Josten, he is and always will be Nathaniel Wesninski. No matter how much he’d like to put Nathaniel behind him, he will always be a part of Neil. 
  * Neil is a force to be reckoned with, and yes. He knows it. 




	35. Chapter 35

  * THey’re in bed. 
  * It’s late, maybe a weekend
  * Neil’s on his back, his hands resting on his stomach, staring at the ceiling, lost in thought
  * Andrew’s on his back, on his side of the bed, they’re not touching
  * He’s watching Neil, watches as his chest moves with every breath he takes, the furrow of his brow every once in a while, the unintentional lip biting 
  * The fan’s whirring in the corner, the windows open, they can hear passing cars and people 
  * Neil can feel Andrew’s gaze, he heaves a sigh and begins to turn to face him
  * But before he can, Andrew’s already said it
  * “119%” 
  * And Neil rolls his eyes bc its endearing but commonplace 
  * He settles back, closing his eyes, and after a few minutes his heart drops
  * Bc he specifically remembers 
  * The last time Andrew’d given him a percent
  * They’d been at 120




	36. Chapter 36

Nobody asked for Andreil angst but here we are

  * They both get their fair share of nightmares
  * Their working on getting better 
  * But mishaps happen, some nights are worse than others
  * Usually they manage to take care of each other and everything’s fine by morning 
  * But consider
  * One night Neil lashes out
  * His foot hits Andrew’s hip or his fist collides with Andrew’s cheek 
  * Andrew jolts awake in blind panic 
  * And Neil doesn’t know where he is or who’s with him
  * And he says something 
  * But it’s not Neil speaking its Nathaniel 
  * But Andrew doesn’t hear Neil or Nathaniel, bc it’s so unfamiliar, his mind goes to the worst possible scenario 
  * And then Andrew’s struggling to breathe 
  * While Neil/Nathaniel is struggling with imaginary enemies 
  * And they’re both caught up in their own nightmares
  * Fueled by each other, in the most unknowing, innocent way
  * Then 
  * It’s Andrew
  * That mumbles Neil’s name
  * Desperately, almost like a prayer, a farewell and an apology all in one 
  * And Neil hears and he snaps out of it 
  * Nathaniel leaves and Neil’s left panting and blinking away shadows 
  * Then he realizes that Andrew’s still stuck so he rolls off the bed and talks him down from the ground 
  * They don’t talk about that night
  * But it’s not one that either of them are about to forget



 

 


	37. Chapter 37

jostenofexy asked:

prompt: the twins + neil (and katelyn/ the whole team because who are we kidding these losers are tight as hell) going to germany with nicky to visit erik because nicky convinced them it was a good idea.

* * *

Nobody but Neil knew Andrew was afraid of heights till now. 

(Gosh this got a lot longer than I thought it would) 

  * But let’s say he has to go bc Nicky’s getting married, cuz lbr, that’s the only reason Neil could convince him he had to go 
  * It’s physically impossible to take a nonstop flight from Columbia to Berlin, but Andrew  _abhors_  take-offs, and if he has to fly some 20+ hours, he doesn’t want to take-off more than necessary
    * So they look into only 1 stop flights, the prices skyrocket, they go from $2k to $6k. And yeah, money’s not too much of a problem, but an extra $4k just bc he couldn’t woman up for 5 minutes is just plain unreasonable 
    * So 2 stops it is. 
  * They get seats so that they pretty much have the whole back of the plane. Which wouldn’t have been a problem if Andrew wasn’t practically hanging off Neil after they take off from Chicago 
    * And I don’t mean he was clutching his boyfriend for dear life, but for the team, the white knuckle grip Andrew has on Neil’s pinky was enough to surprise them 
    * No amount of vodka was going to take the edge off the fear, but that doesn’t stop Andrew from trying 
    * Neil’s pinky become his hand after a little turbulence, his upper arm when they land in Dublin, his shoulder when they hit a spot of pretty bad turbulence
    * Andrew’s practically sitting in Neil’s lap by the time they finally land in Berlin 
  * They finally get there and Erik’s waiting at the airport for them, Neil’s seen Nicky smile, but he’d never seen him look as happy as he did as he made his way to Erik.
  * Everyone falls in love with Erik as soon as they get to know him, he’s very charming, and has a way with words that left no doubt in anyones mind that Nicky was one lucky guy 
  * Everyone but Nicky is staying at the Hilton, so once everyone is settled in and ready Erik takes them sightseeing, 
  * They’re only there for 2 weeks, most of which Nicky and Erik are busy with wedding preparations for 
  * The rest of them kind of do their own thing 
  * Kevin is entranced by the history of the city, he’s the only one listening when a tour guide is talking, or he’s reading from a pamphlet, he doesn’t even care that no one’s listening to him (Andrew is)
  * The upperclassmen usually leave in the morning before the twins, Neil, Kevin, and Katelyn 
  * They all usually meet up for dinner at the end of the day, Nicky and Erik sometimes join. They trade stories, places they saw, people they met, things they did
  * Neil and Kevin still go on runs ~~nerds~~  
  * The Foxes aren’t ones to pass up a good nigh out, Berlin nightlife is a thing, no? 
  * After the wedding everyone parts their separate ways 
    * Matt takes Dan on a tour around Europe
    * Aaron and Katelyn decide to visit Katelyn’s family in London
    * Kevin stays a while longer in Germany, before going back 
    * Nicky and Erik are honeymooning in Venice 
    * Allison and Renee aren’t going to pass up a trip to Italy when they’re so close anyway
    * And as for Neil and Andrew, they quietly head home as soon as they can




	38. Chapter 38

anonymous asked:

Prompt: What happened when Kevin showed up at Wymack's hotel with his broken hand? How did Kevin convince Abby and Wymack not to take him to a hospital? What was Wymack thinking when he saw Kevin so severely injured? 

* * *

 

  * Kevin knows that Wymack is his dad. But, Wymack can’t know, not yet, maybe not ever, but definitely not now. 
  * But he needs him to help him right now, and maybe it’s the blood, maybe its the desperation in his voice, or maybe its the look in his eyes that makes Wymack drop everything and take this kid in like his own
  * Wymack treats all his Foxes like his own, and there was no doubt in his mind when Kevin showed up at his door that a Fox is what Kevin would be 
  * It was at the Christmas banquet, one of the few times that the Foxes had to act civil, and at least show the rest of the NCAA that they weren’t a totally dysfunctional team
  * I like to think that this was one of the few times that they listened to Wymack as soon as he told them to leave, without question, without argument, when they see the worry in his eyes and the tightness around his eyes
  * Abby was the one adamant about getting Kevin to a hospital ASAP, but it was Wymack that told her no, even before Kevin could protest. 
  * Kevin didn’t have to do any convincing that a hospital was the worst possible place to go at that moment, he didn’t have to argue bc Wymack got it. 
  * Wymack knew what this meant, he knew what Kevin was doing by coming to him. He knew just by looking at Kevin’s hand that this hadn’t been an accident. He knew what it meant for The Kevin Day, a left-handed athlete, to have a shattered left hand. 
  * Wymack knew, like he always seems to, he understood, and he knew it wasn’t their best choice, but it was the only one they could make without an enormous backlash, or at least, minimizing the backlash, postponing it for as long as possible
  * So they didn’t take Kevin to a hospital, Abby did the best she could, it would have to be enough, it was more than Kevin was expecting, and he’d be eternally grateful to both her and Wymack, for taking him in when he needed them the most. For not questioning him at the time, and understanding as much as they did, for giving him the chance to get back to Exy, something they didn’t know he _couldn’t_ live without. 
  * And though Wymack didn’t know at the time, what he did for Kevin at the time erased any doubts in Kevin’s mind about the kind of person he was, the kind of dad he would be. 




	39. Chapter 39

Prompt: Andreil using pet names when they’re on the court, when they’re still with the foxes, and then when they’re on opposing teams. But they sound really aggressive and threatening.

* * *

I’m already crying \

  * you might think that im gonna go the “Sweetheart!”, “Darling!” or “Love!” route
    * no
  * you might think im gonna go the “Fucker!”, “Shithead”, or “ Dickwad!” route
    * no
  * I’m gonna go the “Josten!”, “Abram!”, “Minyard” and “Drew!” route
  * That is not to say they don’t use more traditional pet names, but for the sake of appearances, they use their surnames and nicknames as pet names disguised as insults 
  * Confused? Me too. Kinda, Not really. Hear me out  
  * Think Andrew at his usual goalie spot at a game, Neil makes an impossible goal, he gets within hearing distance of Andrew, who proceeds to sneer something along the lines of, “What? Is that all you got, Josten?” 
    * And Neil freezes, bc the only time Andrew’s called him that was on the roof, alone, without an audience, hushed, intimate, and he’s thrown for a loop bc _what does that mean??_
    * Andrew’s got a look in his eyes and Neil gets it, Andrew’s not being mean, he’s telling him he did a good job, that he’s proud of him, but anyone listening in wouldn’t have a clue 
  * And so it begins 
  * With the Foxes, it only took a few months for them to catch on 
    * when Andrew would glare at any of them for calling Neil “Josten”
    * or when Neil would freeze when Andrew called him “Nate” softly
    * or the way Andrew’s shoulders would slowly fall when Neil called him “Drew” 
  * When they’re on their own teams, it’s a little different. It becomes known as the “Minyard-Josten Rivalry” 
  * Everyone just thinks they really hate each other, and them being the little shits they are, know exactly what they’re doing 
    * “Can’t even make a goal to save your life, can you _Josten_? 
    * “You’re one to talk _Minyard_ , you couldn’t save a goal if your life depended on it.”
    * “I’m gonna make you regret your words, _Nate_.” (Oh, he will)
    * “Bring it, _Drew_ ” (He knows full well Andrew’s gonna keep his promise) 
  * Worse? Better? still, when they’re on the same team 
    * “Minyard, would you be a _dear_ , and actually do your damn job!?”
    * “Careful, _darling_ , you piss me off any more, I might have to.” ~~(no not that job)~~
  * Howww about 
    * “What the shit was that _Drew_!?” (Andrew’s cradling a bloody fist from a fight with an opposing striker)
    * “Mind your own goddamned business, _Josten_.” 
      * Translation: 
        * “Are you alright, _love_?” 
        * “I’ll be ok, _babe_ ” 




	40. Chapter 40

  * It was in between classes on a Friday 
  * Aaron was just minding his own business, making his way to Orgo
  * Neil catches up to him and then they’re walking
  * Aaron can’t be bothered to ask what he wants, so he just rolls his eyes and continues walking 
  * Neil doesn’t say anything either, then he takes his phone out to check his messages, Kevin was asking about Columbia and Matt just wanted to know if Neil had seen his letter jacket 
  * He texts a “ _I’ll ask Andrew_.” and a “ _Nah, did you leave it with Dan last weekend? Lol._ ” respectively 
  * Then he turns to Aaron, “Columbia tonight?” 
  * Aaron shrugs
  * Which is exactly what Andrew would have done to tell Neil that it was up to him. 
  * So he texts Kevin again, “ _Yes. We’ll ttyl_.” 
  * They reach Neil’s class first, he stops, and Aaron stops with him 
  * Neil turns and looks at Aaron and he goes, “Yes?” 
  * Which is the shortened version of their “Yes or no?” Andrew would have understood, and replied accordingly
  * Aaron has no fucking clue what Neil’s going on about
  * So naturally, he goes, “Yeah…?” back, which Andrew probably wouldn’t have done, but Neil’ll take it.
  * So he leans in and just pecks Aaron, real quick, like blink-and-you’ll-miss-it quick
  * He immediately realizes he made a mistake.
  * But not the mistake he’d actually made…
  * “Oh my god, I’m sorry, I thought you said yes Andrew-”
  * And Aaron
  * Aaron went into full shock mode - Like, _Did Josten just - Did a dude just - I - The - What_ - “What the actual fuck, Josten!?” 
  * And Neil freezes 
  * Like deer in the headlights, full on, _I have made a grave mistake_  frozen
  * “Shit.”  
“You motherfucker. Just-”  
“Listen, I’m sorry-”  
“Just leave!”  
“I didn’t mean to-”  
“Get!” 
  * Neil tells Andrew like the sweetheart he is
  * Andrew did not appreciate the irony for at least a few hours
  * Kevin laughed at them for a full minute with Nicky when they found out that night 
  * Aaron doesn’t talk about it
  * Neil would rather not bring it up either
  * Andrew, _eventually_ , smiles fondly at the memory 




	41. Chapter 41

Aaandreil cuddling

  * Andrew doesn’t 
  * Like no. Like. Absolutely not. No. 
  * But Neil
  * Neil’s like, hand on his forhead, drama queen, how could you do this to me, please, I need your love
  * And Andrew’s glaring, totally not amused 
  * So Neil’s like, fine 
  * So he sleeps hugging a pillow 
  * And its months down the line 
  * And Andrew feels kinda sorta bad 
  * So he starts with his arm 
  * And just 
  * Gives Neil his arm to hug through the night
  * And its hella uncomfortable 
  * But Neil practically glows with appreciation for Andrew
  * So he goes with it for a few weeks
  * But its affecting his goal keeping
  * So he asks 
  * He tells Neil
  * And this bitch
  * _Understands???_  
  * And Andrew’s like, well fuck. 900%. 
  * But let’s say it’s been a while
  * And Andrew’s absolutely comfortable with Neil
  * Which means he’s comfortable with all the affection and touching and *makes expressive hand gestures* 
  * So now they do cuddle 
  * Andrew sleeps on his back
  * Neil’s tucked into his side
  * With his arm around Andrew’s middle
  * And his head on Andrew’s chest
  * And sometimes Andrew wraps his arm around Neil 
  * Bc he can 
  * Motherfuckers
  * 901%



ALTERNATIVELY  

Consider this

  * Neil’s got 3 inches on Andrew
  * Which, I’m _aware_ , doesn’t mean Andrew has to be the little spoon 
  * But let’s say that Andrew is the little spoon!!
  * “But Andrew doesn’t sleep unless his backs against the wall!” You say
  * And I hear you. But I raise you this. 
  * The only reason Andrew needs a wall behind him is bc he needs to feel safe
  * Now say that it’s years down the line, and Neil is his safety, his security
  * Neil becomes Andrew’s _metaphorical_ wall. 
  * You’re welcome. 



 


	42. Chapter 42

A PROMPT: The foxes, in their old age, all still interacting and hanging out but slowly losing their family as they age and die. Mourning together and reminiscing on their lives as a big family. :D

* * *

Probably not what you had in mind, I’m sorry love, I did my best, I hope you like

  * Renee is the first of our 9 Foxes to go, a decade after graduating, she contracted a disease while working overseas with the Peace Corps, I guess what they say about the good dying young can’t be all wrong. Every Fox since Renee to the then-present attended the funeral. Andrew disappeared for 2 days after hearing the news. He came back for the funeral and then went back home to Neil. 
  * Matt and Dan die in a car crash, a few years after. Drunk driver crashed into them. It wasn’t pretty. Neil cried more than Andrew had ever seen. Then Neil and Andrew adopted their daughter, who Neil was already godfather to. 
  * Allison dies in a plane crash the year after. It hits the original Foxes hard, they’d gone from going to each other graduations and weddings and games to attending 3 funerals so close to each other for 4 members of their family. 
  * Andrew gets cancer. He knew it was coming, Neil knew, but it didn’t make the prognosis any easier. Aaron was his doctor, Nicky was devastated. Kevin was almost like an anchor for him, he didn’t react negatively or positively, Andrew appreciated that. When Andrew got too sick to play, Neil went on indefinite leave to take care of his husband. He gets back on the court eventually. Andrew never did quit smoking. 
  * Nicky lives with Erik in Germany. Erik dies first, heart attack. Nicky moves back to the States after. He’s never really been the same. But he loves his nieces and nephews all the same. He dies peacefully of old age after living a long, happy life. 
  * Neil dies because of Exy. He took one too many hits after getting back on the court. He ended up in a coma twice, he was losing his memory, and he’d literally taken too many balls to the head. Nicky eventually moved in and helped Neil’s(Matt’s) daughter take care of Neil when his condition worsened. 
  * Aaron outlives his brother, cousin, and wife. Katelyn and the baby died in childbirth, years before. Aaron is left with his son and daughter, raising them as a single dad, all the while working as a doctor at the local hospital. He dies of old age, surrounded by his children, their spouses, and his grandchildren
  * Kevin is the last Fox to go. His health in the perfect condition, no matter how much vodka he’d downed in college, along with his vigorous fitness regimen that he followed to his deathbed, kept him healthy and well. He watched his teammates, his family, live, grow old, die. He watched their children grow as if they were his own. He dies much like Aaron, of old age, surrounded by the people he loves, but only some of his family, bc he’d be joining the rest of his family soon enough 




	43. Chapter 43

OTP meme: “One sending memes to the other while they’re at work so much they turn their phone off in exasperation.“

* * *

 

(Changed it from work to class)

  * Neil is in chem, a class he’s kind of having trouble in, so like the good student he is, he’s paying attention and taking notes
  * Then he gets a text from Andrew, and he absentmindedly checks it
  * It takes a second to load, and when it does, Neil just scrunches his eyebrows and stares in utter confusion 
  * There is a frog staring at him with big eyes and pink lips 
    * _Do frogs even have lips?_
  * He texts a “ _What_?” back and a few seconds later his phone buzzes with a new message
  * This ones a dog with its eyes open wide
    * _Is that even possible?_
  * He looks closer and theres a tiny “wow” on the dog 
  * “ _Andrew?_ ”
  * The next message is a picture of an angry looking dude with a green background
    * _Is that the dude from Transformers?_  
  * “ _Andrew_.” 
  * A picture of two words, a name, in all caps, “ **JOHN CENA** ” 
    * _WHO?_
  * _“What’s going on?”_
  * A picture of a skeptical baby, with the words “You mean to tell me / Your real name isn’t Mom?”
  * Neil just stares at this one for 30 seconds, uncomprehending, and then another message comes in 
  * It’s another baby, with its fist up, at a beach, captioned. “Don’t know a question on a test / Answer is in another question”
  * Neil’s lip twitches, but he’s missing notes, he puts his phone down and continues working 
  * His phone buzzes again
  * And again 
  * He gets annoyed and checks it, two more pictures, one was the frog again, but it was screaming and it had a red filter over it
  * His phone buzzes with another picture
  * The other was another baby. _What the fuck, Andrew?_ The baby was wearing a tuxedo, pointing at the ground, captioned “Next time you steal my nose / I’ll break your fucking legs” 
  * Neil raises an eyebrow at that one
  * The newest was another baby, couldn’t be older than a few months, captioned “That wasn’t really an airplane / That was just a spoon” 
  * Neil was not amused
  * His phone had buzzed 2 more times, the pictures were still loading 
  * It buzzed again 
  * In exasperation he shut his phone off and went back to taking notes
  * Just as the bell rang signaling the end of class 
  * _Damnit, Andrew_




	44. Chapter 44

They’re at the hospital   

  * Renee just had her first baby, a daughter
  * Andrew and Neil visit to congratulate her and her husband
  * When they get there, the baby is in Renee’s arms 
  * Her husband takes the baby so Renee can hug both the boys 
  * She’s got dark circles under her eyes, but she can’t stop smiling and she is so, so happy 
  * Neil asks for the baby’s name
  * (I can’t think of a singular, unique name, fill in the blank, Catarina or Persephone or what have you) 
  * Then Renee takes her back from her husband 
  * She’s just blinking wide eyed up at he mother, not crying, comfortable 
  * Renee asks Neil if he’d like to hold her
  * He gently refuses, not at all skilled at the art of holding newborns and entirely terrified of the prospect
  * She asks Andrew 
  * He doesn’t say no
  * After a few seconds he bites the inside of his lip and leans forward 
  * Renee smiles so wide 
  * She gently places the baby on Andrew’s arms and sits back 
  * Andrew 
  * Andrew just stares back at the baby in his arms, this, tiny, insignificant, helpless thing, blinking sleepily up at him 
  * Neil is staring at Andrew
  * Trying to gauge a reaction, bc he doesn’t know if this is a great idea 
  * But he glances at Renee and she’s smiling at him like she knows exactly what he’s thinking and just nods at him like he has nothing to worry about 
  * Baby yawns, she has no teeth and her tiny nose scrunches 
  * Andrew feels…weird 
  * He’s never felt like this and he doesn’t really know what to do
  * He doesn’t rock or sway, just stands still, not looking away from her face 
  * She falls asleep like that, in his arms
  * He doesn’t give her back yet 
  * He lowers himself gently onto the foot of Renee’s bed and just watches her sleep
  * Neil and Husband quietly leave the two alone
  * Andrew looks up a while later, not having realized they left, then he hands Renee the baby back, and then Renee asks
  * If he’d be her godfather
  * She tells him that he doesn’t have to answer now, or that he should feel obliged to say yes at all 
  * But Andrew 
  * He heard her question, and he’d never say, but it didn’t matter if she’d asked or not, he was going to love and protect this baby as if she were his own no matter his title 
  * He reached out and ever so gently rubbed a knuckle down the baby’s cheek
  * That was all the answer Renee needed 




	45. Chapter 45

anonymous asked:

your hcs for andreil are absolutely wonderful so is there anyway you can write like an hc where one gets amnesia and what happens afterward? idk i just like me some andreil angst sometimes 

* * *

 

Thank you so much darling! <3   
  
Andreil Angst here we go 

  * Andrew looked away for half a second. 
  * He needed to check on Neil, see how he was doing, if he was ok
  * It was half a second too long 
  * The opposing teams striker didn’t know that Andrew’s attention was diverted, if she had, she might’ve slowed 
  * She might’ve 
  * Fact of the matter was, in that half a second, all 6 feet, 170 pounds of her smashed against Andrew’s 5 feet, 130 frame
  * He lost his helmet 
  * His head hit the edge of the goal hard enough that he was unconscious immediately 
  * He has no recollection of this game. 
  * Or any game he played since high school 
  * He remembers Aaron and Nicky and Tilda
  * And Drake
  * But he doesn’t remember Wymack or Bee or Renee
  * Or this kid that stays in his hospital room all day, and sleeps on the armchair most nights 
  * All he knows is that he shouldn’t feel safe with someone sleeping in the same room as him 
  * And yet
  * This kid gets away with it, bc for some reason, his mind doesn’t register him as a threat 
  * Neil. He said his name was Neil. 
  * Nothing. His name meant nothing to him. He was nothing. 
  * Neil requests a leave that he isn’t granted 
  * He doesn’t show up to practice anyway
  * But he’s the Neil Josten, they’ll take him when he decides to play again
  * But for now 
  * Andrew 
  * But Andrew didn’t want anything to do with him
  * But Neil didn’t get Andrew bc he didn’t fight for him, so that’s what he’s going to do now, but 
  * Andrew didn’t want…anything
  * He didn’t want to be near Neil, he wanted time and space
  * He wanted to get out of the hospital
  * And so Neil gave him what he wanted***
  * But he shouldn’t have
  * Bc he lost him then 
  * Andrew never did want anything to do with him
  * And that was how it was going to be   
  
(***Alt ending for those who want a happier ending)
  * Andrew wanted nothing 
  * And Neil always was nothing  




	46. Chapter 46

anonymous asked:

I've got to be a little shit now and ask about the fight when neil finds out about andrew punishing himself by staying away. I'm sorry but your hc's are so good, i need my fill

* * *

But your _my_ lil shit, so it’s ok!  <3   
  
Oh dear, this is prob gonna get heavy (drug, self-harm, anxiety/mental break tw) your fair warning   
  
(This got dark. Seriously. Heed the TW. Please.) 

  * It was like smoking - 
  * Staying away from Neil. 
  * It was knowing full well that lighting that cigarette was killing him, and yet lighting it anyway
  * Time and time again 
  * Staying away from Neil was a drug he knew to stay away from 
  * (But it was such a _harmful_ drug)
  * Staying away from Neil hurt him worse than any of his knives ever did
  * Neil was his Reason 
  * And if Neil was angry at him, then he’d upset his Reason 
  * Neil had made him promise to say something if he ever felt like turning a blade on himself
  * But staying away from Neil left no scars. 
  * And what Neil didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him 
  * Until he walked into their room that one night
  * Andrew was sitting on the ground with his back against the wall, hidden by their bed
  * Andrew didn’t register Neil’s presence, caught in a mental breakdown, the kind of which he hadn’t had since before Bee
  *  “Drew?” Neil’s concerned voice asked, bc no matter how mad or upset, Andrew needed help. 
  * Neil’s voice had Andrew shrinking in on himself, a whimper escaping his lips 
  * “Andrew.” Neil didn’t want to touch him for fear of making it worse, and so he talked to him
  * “Hey, hey, you’re ok.”  
“You’re safe Andrew. It’s me. Just me.”  
“Neil. It’s Neil.” 
  * And the look of utter relief that flooded Andrew’s countenance once he realized that it was Neil, broke Neil’s heart
  * But what broke it worse, was when Andrew realized he was relieved and promptly shut himself off from Neil and turned, telling him to leave
  * Neil wasn’t sure what to do
  * But he wasn’t going to argue with Andrew after that
  * So he called Bee 
  * She listened 
  * And he found out from her,
  * What Andrew was doing.
  * Neil could’ve been angry
  * He could’ve been furious
  * But a few tears had already escaped before Bee had finished speaking 
  * She asked to speak to Andrew
  * Neil numbly handed him the phone
  * They’re working on it. 




	47. Chapter 47

anonymous asked:

I don't know if you've done this already, short term memory, but andreil first fight??? Thank you xx

* * *

I have not! Let’s see~ 

  * Neither of them knew they were fighting until they were already fighting  
  * As in 
  * The situation was so unfamiliar that Neil paused in the middle of saying something and had to consider the last time he had talked to Andrew with anger lacing his words 
  * Annoyance, sure
  * Frustration, maybe
  * But anger?
  * “Are-are we - fighting?”  
“What does that have anything to do with anything, Josten!?”   
Neil just raises a brow at this, until Andrew realizes what he’d said, or rather, how he’d said it. He looks taken aback for a second before -   
“…apparently.” 
  * But no, Andrew wasn’t going to back down, and neither was Neil 
  * And so they fought
  * The team didn’t notice until practice the next morning when Neil said Andrew’s name
  * “Andrew.” Sharp, jagged, unlike they’d ever heard it come out of Neil’s mouth 
  * If that wasn’t strange enough, Andrew didn’t listen, which was normal to them, but he always listened to what Neil had to say, even if he didn’t do anything about it, he’d listen
  * They tried to make up after practice, in the locker room, but Andrew stood by what he said, and Neil wasn’t ready to back down either
  * And so that led to a rather tense night
  * In the end, they compromised, Neil would limit his night practices with Kevin to 4 nights instead of the 6 he currently had and Andrew would join them on court for 2 of them
  * Allison lost that bet. 




	48. Chapter 48

anonymous asked:

Okay I guess it isn't quite a prompt but what do you think would happen if andreil and malec would meet???!?! Would Magnus and Andrew get along. Would Neil and Alec be hit it of bc if their snarky mouth that just can't quit.? Give me something love!

 

* * *

Wonderful! 

Let’s see

I think Magnus and Andrew would _absolutely_ get along. I feel like Magnus could dial up the snark and throw in just enough insults to get on Andrew’s good side. I think that the two of them would totally enjoy a Friday night with a bottle of vodka and a few cigarettes. 

I think that Alec and Neil could make flower crowns together while Magnus and Neil could sass each other to high heaven and laugh about it after. 

I think that even if Alec and Neil didn’t get along, they would for the sole reason that their boyfriends do. 

Gosh, I’m totally imagining a total BroTP situation for Andrew and Magnus. 

I think that Magnus would seriously interest Andrew bc of the knowledge and wisdom he hides behind the glitter and snark. I can see them becoming really good friends bc they’ve both seen some of the worst the world has to offer. And they’ve survived, thrived. 

They both have people they love despite all they’ve seen, and I don’t think Andrew really has had anyone that could relate to him and his situation. And Magnus fills that person shaped hole in his life.

I think Alec and Andrew wouldn’t particularly get along. Like, maybe they’ll be ok if Neil or Magnus is in the room with them, but if it’s just the two of them, then I think it might be a little awkward for Alec, Andrew not bothering to care. 

I think that Alec and Neil bond over working out! It’s a known fact that Magnus and Andrew would rather eat dirt than go on a run. So Neil and Alec would get up early and go on runs and hit the gym together. 

I can see Neil teaching Alec exy basics, and Alec teaching Neil how to shoot a bow and arrow. 

But yes! All four of my sons happy and healthy and together. Amazing. 


	49. Chapter 49

anonymous asked:

Idk if this counts as a prompt but Neil and Andrew as adoptive or foster parents to teenagers like how would they handle the sass or the worry of their kids missing curfew?

 

* * *

Oooh I like! 

  * Andrew liked children before they could talk 
  * Babies didn’t ask stupid questions 
  * “Daaaad. How many colors are there?” 
  * Babies didn’t ask questions he had no answer to 
  * “Why?” 
  * Again and again and again
  * Andrew also liked children before they grew their own opinions, it made them all the easier to handle
  * “I don’t think that’s that best way to go about this situation, dad.” 
  * Andrew really, really pitied any parents that had teenagers 
  * “I’m going out with Ash, we’ll be back!”   
“When?”  
“Dunno, I’ll call you!”   
“No - when?”   
“Later!”   
“When!?”  
“Bye!” 
  * Neil was going to die of stress before hitting 50
  * “Jordan home yet?”   
“Haven’t seen him.”   
“Jordan!”   
No answer.  
“ - He should’ve been home 20 minutes ago, its almost midnight.”   
“He’s not picking up his phone.”   
“Oh, this lil shit’s gonna get it.”   
“You say that every time he breaks curfew.”   
“No one asked you Andrew.” 
  * “Can I go to a concert?”   
“…Details?”   
“Out of town, with a few people.”   
“How far out of town?”   
“Diego’s parents are letting him go!”  
“How far, Liza?”  
“Does it matter!? You and papa never let me go anywhere!”   
“Liza.”   
“For f - “  
“Liza!” This was Neil, “Don’t swear sweetheart, what’s wrong?”   
She stomps away at this point.
  * “Why’d you talk me into this again?”   
“What?”   
“Marrying the likes of you.”   
“You love me.”   
“I hate you.”  




	50. Chapter 50

anonymous asked:

How about some cute/fluffy/SMUTTY andreil hc about their lives in their shared apt and just domestic life

* * *

Oh dear oh dear oh dear oh dear 

  * Andrew cleans obsessively, he doesn’t like it if there’s dishes in the sink or laundry that needs to be sorted. So he cleans a lot, which is great for Neil bc this lil shit couldn’t care how messy their room was, but he appreciates coming home to a clean apartment after a long day at practice or from a game.
  * Andrew feeds both the cats. He also spends the most time with them bc if Neil isn’t working, then he’s at the gym or on a run. The cats do prefer Neil bc he gives them more attention, but Andrew does absentmindedly pet them if they come sit with him. 
  * They alternate who gets the massage after a game. Andrew had given the first one, and Neil would never tire of Andrew’s hands working his shoulders and back and  _lower_  
  * Kisses! Forehead kisses before bed, good morning kisses, quick pecks before heading out. “love you”s mumbled into kisses, against lips. Kisses after games, kisses before games.(I really hope y’all know where I’m going with this) Kisses in the shower, kisses on the dinning table, kisses on the couch, kisses on the _kitchen counter_  K i s s e s. 
  * Andrew wakes up some morning and can’t find his glasses. So he has to call Neil and ask him to find them for him, and Neil just picks them up from in front of Andrew’s face and grins while Andrew glares bc _gdi I’m aware I’m blind, shut up, no one asked you_
  * They probably go months between taking showers alone, all the wasted water and missed _kisses_ …
  * Cuddles! Neil is such a slut for attention, and it’s not like Andrew’s complaining 
  * And yes. Sex. Gosh. They do the do. But…gosh, ok. Andrew. He has this thing about going slow and not rushing and Neil can live with it, until it goes from pleasurable to downright _torturous._ Bc goddamn - Andrew knows what he’s doing. 
  * Sleepovers! The Foxes, if they have a game close by or they’re just visiting, Neil and Andrew always let them stay over. Hell, Neil practically drags Matt over sometimes. 
  * Kids. Ik I have multiple hc’s that contradict each other about this, some saying that Andrew says no when Neil asks about adopting, one with them having 2 kids, and one where they adopt Matt and Dan’s daughter after they die in a car crash (wow I have a problem)
  * But for this, I’m gonna say they adopt a daughter, she was only weeks old when they did. They both take off work for a year ( ~~shit hc idea~~ ) and it’s a lot of sleepless nights and diapers and crying and other baby goodness that comes with, but Neil practically glows with happiness and Andrew loves her more than he ever thought possible 




	51. Chapter 51

ok im not even sorry but the foxes overreacting to just how hot neil is is my fav thing ever sue me 

  * It’s not even that he’s got the jawline and the cheekbones and the arms and the legs and the eyes and the nose and the chest and the hair and smile it’s the fact that he. has. no. fucking. clue. 
  * Like oblivious is one thing, but “Goddamnit Neil can you please stop!?”  
“Stop what?”  
“STOP IT!”  
“Stop what!?” 
  * *Cue Dan and/or Allison and/or Nicky and/or Matt and/or Newbie yelling in frustration and Leaving™*
  * Matt’s bisexual. I have nothing more to add to this point. 
  * Neil is also the best kisser. Yeah. 
  * Allison has bets based solely on Neil’s looks. 
  * “Can you not?”  
“Not what?”   
“NEIL!”  
“What!?”
  * Also can we talk about his goddamn personality?? Like?? Polite? Yes. Kind? Yes. Honest? Yes. Genuine? Yes. Honestly, all the Foxes, and let’s face it most of PSU, are like sign me the fuck up
  * “For fuck’s sake.”  
“S’wrong?”   
“For fuck’s sake.”  
“…?”  
“For fUCK’S SAKE.”
  * And when he figures out a style of clothes and hair that works for him, people legit double take, bc like, he’s hot. That’s established. But…he…doesn’t know it and he’s totally not an asshole? 
  * Andrew’s in over his head, this gon’ be a problem alright  
  * “NEIL”  
“Yes?”   
“NEIL, PLEASE.”   
“Yes?”  
“NEEILLL”
  * this boi i swear 




	52. Chapter 52

So apparently y’all like the idea of Andreil fighting

And I had an ask for a first fight, and I didn’t want it to be too heavy for a first fight, but this one’s been bothering me for a while so here you go 

No particular place in time, not really a fight per say bc Andrew can’t really argue Neil’s point

  * Neil’s had enough of Andrew 
  * He hated how Andrew never made anything about himself
  * How little Andrew cared about himself
  * Oh? Andrew’s sick? Why don’t I - “No.”
  * Andrew’s injured? I’ll - “No.”
  * Andrew literally collapses from sheer exhaustion after a game?  - “No.”
  * Andrew’s having a panic attack? - “ _No_.”
  * Andrew had a nightmare? - “No.” 
  * Neil wants to scream 
  * And so that’s exactly what he does. 
  * He’s had enough. Andrew has a broken arm from a game related injury, he hasn’t slept in 2 days, the nightmares keep him from taking naps, he’s been running a temperature that Neil can feel from where he’s standing
  * And so he snaps. 
  * “You are -” He falters when Andrew doesn’t even acknowledge him
  * Then he gets angry 
  * “You’re weak.” Andrew’s brow narrows infinitesimally, but it’s enough for Neil to know he has his attention
  * “You’re fragile and weak and frail and you need help.” 
  * Andrew doesn’t deem this worthy of an answer.
  * “You can’t keep expecting to do everything alone! I’M HERE!” 
  * Andrew might be regretting everything at this point 
  * “Andrew. Andrew - fucking look at me.” A pause. “I mean it.” 
  * Andrew glares at him
  * “You’re human goddamnit! Stop acting like nothing can touch you, you aren’t invincible! No one’s asking you to be!” His voice gets small “I don’t need you to be.” 
  * Andrew 
  * Andrew’s not angry 
  * He’s just…done. He knows what he’s doing isn’t healthy, but he didn’t think that it would effect Neil in any way
  * And so they work on it, bc that’s all they can hope to do, and it’s always enough for them




	53. Chapter 53

anonymous asked:

 Andrew finding out about Nicky assaulting Neil his first time at Eden's Twilight? Maybe it's like Andrew's senior year so Neil and him have been together for like years 

* * *

  * It was an argument of sorts over who had kissed who 
  * Andrew and Neil 
  * Neil and Kevin 
  * Neil and Matt
  * Neil and Allison 
  * Andrew and Renee
  * Allison and Renee
  * Allison and Dan 
  * Dan and Matt
  * Aaron and Katelyn
  * Nicky and Matt
  * Lotsa kisses, kisses for everybody!
  * But then Nicky and Neil had come up and the blood drained from Nicky’s face bc _shit, this was never supposed to come up again_  
  * And Andrew doesn’t see the big deal, bc it was just a kiss, right?
  * But then Neil reacts differently to it then he did when telling them about kissing Kevin or Matt 
  * So Andrew zeros in on Nicky 
  * And Nicky woman’s up and admits to what happened that night they first took Neil to Columbia 
  * And Andrew
  * Well. 
  * Andrew is furious. Like mad with rage, angry. 
  * Bc _How. Dare. Anyone. Touch. Neil. Without. Consent._
  * Neil tries to brush it off, telling Andrew it had been a long time ago, and that Nicky didn’t mean any harm, and other excuses he knew Andrew wasn’t going to listen to 
  * Bc yeah, Nicky didn’t mean harm, but that didn’t make what he did any better  
  * So Nicky apologizes to Neil, in front of Andrew, bc he never had before, so he was going to start now
  * And it wasn’t much, or close to enough for Andrew, but it was a start 
  * Neil forgave Nicky and they put it past them 
  * But Andrew would always trust his cousin just a little less from then on 




	54. Chapter 54

anonymous asked:

andreil + social media? (if you haven't already haha)

* * *

I have not!

Let’s see

Snapchat is their go to. They both adore the idea of a picture not lasting longer than however many seconds they set it to and they both take advantage of the fact. Andrew will send Neil pictures of random things for a full 10 seconds, but if he ever sends a selfie, 4 seconds is his max. And Neil likes narrating his day to Andrew, especially after Andrew graduates. Andrew will come home after a long day, and open his phone to a minimum of 37 new snaps from Neil. 

Facebook. It’s mostly just to keep in contact with the other Foxes, and occasionally fan service bc Neil becomes quite famous, and well, Andrew was an enigma himself, and once they come out to the public, well, grocery shopping was never meant to be so difficult. 

Twitter. I think they’d both need verified Twitter accounts bc of fans. I don’t think they use theirs much, but again, more to keep in contact with the Foxes, and interact with fans. 

Instagram. Exy. Neil’s Insta is everything Exy, be it courts, or equipment, or players, or stats, or uniforms. It’s all Exy. Andrew has an Insta. It’s mostly just pictures of Neil. Neil watching TV or Neil in uniform or Neil sitting in front of Andrew at a restaurant or Neil and their cats. All the Neil.

And of course. Tumblr, This one no one but they know about them. Neil is still an Exy blog, bc this child has a problem. But Andrew. Andrew is a fandom blog bc I seriously hc that he is a major bookworm and nothing you say is gonna convince me otherwise, other than that he chronicles the Adventures of Sir Fat Cat McCatterson and King Fluffkins, and occasionally Exy 


	55. Chapter 55

zoe3e3e asked:

Could you possibly please write about the foxes find out Neil has the oh so awesome ability to manipulate the 4 elements (because why not).

* * *

Of course!

_~~“But I believe, Neil can save the world!”~~ _ _~~  
~~ _

Lol

  * It was a secret. One that even Nathan didn’t know about. And after his mother died, Neil was the only one in the world who knew 
  * That is, until Neil let his emotions get a little out of hand at night practice with Kevin and Andrew. Kevin didn’t notice, but Andrew could tell from the goal that Neil’s hair was blowing the opposite direction than his own 
  * He didn’t think much of it until he started paying close attention
  * Neil never sweat in the heat or shivered in the cold
  * From an early age he’d learned to control the elements in his favor, getting water from plants to drink, using air to keep himself cool in the heat, using the extra body heat fire gave him to keep warm in the cold, creating rockslides to keep himself and his mother safe from his fathers men
  * He had to use blood bending at 15, against said men, he still has nightmares. 
  * Andrew had to make sure that he wasn’t just seeing things
  * So, elaborate prank/mission to get Neil to use these strange powers of his, in turn, proving that he had powers and that Andrew wasn’t hallucinating commenced 
  * It was during practice, Andrew shut down the goal, and let Neil run the team to the ground 
  * It wasn’t until Nicky collapsed and Kevin threw up that Neil realized his mistake 
  *  Andrew was smirking, exhausted but triumphant 
  *  Neil hadn’t broken a sweat, and in doing so had given up a secret he’d promised his mother he would keep
  * Matt was looking at Neil in awe and slight trepidation, Nicky was unconscious, Kevin was staring at Neil trying to figure what was wrong with what he was seeing
  * Allison and Dan were confused, Renee was convinced he was fine, Aaron didn’t get it, and Andrew was still smirking 
  * But it was far enough along for Neil to trust his family with his secret. He knew they wouldn’t betray him and that he had nothing to worry about 



Bonus: Imagine Andreil on the roof and Andrew’s cold, so Neil makes a flame over his palm to keep Andrew warm 

Bonus Bonus: Neil lighting Andrew’s cigarettes with his finger, Andrew hates  ~~loves~~ it


	56. Chapter 56

It was supposed to be a regular Friday night

  * Neither of them had a game, and so they and a couple of teammates decided to go out for drinks 
  * Neil wanted to get in an extra workout bc they had no game
  * So he tells Andrew to go ahead, and that he’d catch up with them
  * Andrew rolls his eyes and does as he’s asked bc believe it or not he does have friends on their team, and he was never one to turn down a night out 
  * And it wasn’t the first time Neil had told him that he’d catch up with them, so he didn’t think much of it 
  * Until Neil was running late
  * And Andrew wasn’t worried, just ticked that he’s taking so long, so he calls Neil and it goes to voicemail, he hangs up
  * He calls again a half hour later, he might be slightly worried when he doesn’t pick up, but then Neil calls back as soon as he hung up 
  * “Hello?”  
But it’s not Neil  
“Who is this?”   
“Memorial Regional, are you related to Neil Josten?”  
“What happened” Andrew’s up and walking to his car   
“Car accident. I’m sorry, he’s undergoing surgery. Does he have any relatives I can call? He has no emergency contact, no next of kin.”   
“I’m on my way.”   
“Sir, are you -” Andrew had stopped listening after ‘car accident’
  * Andrew’s not freaking out, he’s not. It’s ok. Neil’s gonna be ok. ANdrew’s calm. He is nOt panicking, not in the slightest. 
  * When he gets there Neil’s still in surgery 
  * He’s told to wait in the waiting room, but Andrew’s beginning to feel nauseous, he starts pacing 
  * And then a nurse comes to him and tells him about a ruptured lung and broken ribs and a cracked sternum and internal bleeding and 
  * and the room’s spinning 
  * He calls Renee with numb fingers, “Neil - Neil, car accident. Surgery. Can you…Mem-Memorial Regional. Please.”   
“Of course.” 
  * Renee is a while away, she calls Matt, he gets there before she does.
  * “Hey, hey man. What - uh, did they tell you anything?”   
“It’s bad.” He tells him what the nurse did. Andrew’s not going to cry in front of Matt. He’s not. 
  * Renee gets there as the doctor comes in to tell him that Neil’s out of surgery, in the ICU
  * She hugs him tighter than she ever has but still not tight enough for Andrew
  * He’s let into the ICU on account of Neil not having any family but a boyfriend 
  * There’s tubes and needles and stitches and bandages and bruises and machines and a cast and his eyes are closed but it’s Neil. It’s his Neil. 
  * _It’s his Neil._
  * They’re gonna be ok. 




	57. Chapter 57

anonymous asked:

Ok but like Andrew would never be on team iron man, he knows what it feels like to want to protect his family and would do everything for them???? Like Steve would to do everything for bucky and protect him????(I just want my son on my team)

* * *

(I do too babe)

But I’m also convinced that Andrew sees the sense in what Tony is saying

I think that the student (Charles?) that died in Sokovia would be reason enough for Andrew to be Team Ironman. Loss of innocent life is the biggest NO in Andrew’s book. 

Listen. 

_Loss of innocent life is the biggest NO in Andrew’s book.  
_

And if there’s one point that Tony’s trying to make in this whole situation, it’s that. 

Tony trying to keep the Avengers together and undivided is something I think Andrew would appreciate(?) Because maybe he doesn’t like everyone, but he does know the meaning of family, he knows all too well that family doesn’t end in blood and the Avengers fighting each other isn’t something Andrew could get behind

Cass. I mean, obviously not in the same sense as Tony and his mother, but Andrew knows enough to understand. He’s on Tony’s side for this too.

And yes. Andrew “knows what it feels like to want to protect his family and would do everything for them” 

But so does Tony, and that’s what he’s trying to do in CACW, trying to keep the Avengers from falling apart

Cap “would to do everything for Bucky and protect him” but everything includes letting his family fall apart. And Andrew isn’t about that.

Does this make me any less team Cap trash? No. 

Does this mean Andrew can’t be team Cap anyway? No.

To each their own love, but I think for these reasons, Andrew is Team Ironman.


	58. Chapter 58

Neil is an asshole. 

  * Like, I know y‘all like your “Regulation Hottie, Sweetheart with a Mouth” Neil Josten
  * But can you imagine
  * Neil straight up _ignoring_ a classmate or a fan
  * Not bc they being hella rude, bc the hella rude bitches get a stare and/or roasted 
  * But just bc Neil doesn’t feel like it
  * Like he and Matt’ll be walking to class and everyone stops to talk to Matt or call his name, and Matt smiles, and answers and is the sweet cinnamon roll we love
  * But Neil. This asshole, just, keeps walking
  * Like. “I don’t know ‘em, whatever.” 
  * “ _Whatever_.” 
  * “ _ **Whatever**_.”  
  * Which leads to Neil and Andrew becoming the fucking Power Couple™ of PSU
  * Bc they take no shit
  * And will d e s t r o y you if you cross either of their paths 
  * And he’s a cocky son of a bitch
  * Interviews, press, talk shows, what have you 
  * Cocky lil shit that doesn’t care, but with press it becomes more pronounced
  * He’ll sneer. He’ll glare, he’ll scowl. 
  * Andrew has a hard (ha, pun not intended) time keeping it in his pants after particularly grueling interviews 
  * He becomes Regulation Hottie Neil Josten, that neither has the time nor the patience to deal with your salty ass
  * Andrew hates him 
  * Andrew also adores watching the fallout that his boyfriend leaves behind
  * _Andrew hates him_. 




	59. Chapter 59

Listen. 

  * Aaron Minyard deserves the world and shame on you for not thinking so 
  * He was abused as a child
  * He was separated from his only brother, his twin, left on his own to fend for himself
  * He mother was his abuser
  * He lost his mother when said twin promised to kill her for abusing him. Don’t you dare tell me _relief_ is the only thing Aaron felt at the loss of Tilda. You don’t know enough about abusive relationships if you think so.
  * He never felt safe as a child, how could he?
  * He took drugs to numb the world, a world that didn’t do him any favors. He became addicted to said drugs. He overcame that addiction, believe what you will, but he did so _for_ Andrew and nothing you say will convince me otherwise. 
  * No, dust is not the same thing as the hard drugs he was doing. And yes. He stopped taking dust when Neil asked Andrew not to. When Neil. Asked. Andrew. Not Aaron. Andrew. And Andrew took it away from Aaron without any forewarning, and Aaron _did - not - argue._
  * Also. Their agreement. Neither of them would date till after graduation. Aaron would stick with Andrew until then. Andrew would protect Aaron until then. Those were the terms, yes?
  * And when Aaron met Kaitlyn, he tried not to see her, for Andrew’s sake.
  * But then he fell in love.
  * How dare you call that problematic behavior.
  * You cannot use Kaitlyn and Aaron’s relationship as a reason to hate Aaron when you adore Andrew for doing the same thing with Neil. 
  * He’s referred to as the “Normal” twin. Why. For what reason should Aaron not have the same right to act out the way Andrew did? They have similar pasts, no matter how much you’d like to ignore Aaron’s.
  * A doctor. 
  * Listen to me. 
  * A doctor. 
  * How dare you not only not love Aaron, but actively hate him when he is less problematic than Andrew. 



* * *

anonymous asked:

Tbh I get what you're saying about Aaron and stuff in that post about him but I can't help but hate him. I can't stand him. I'm gay, he's homophobic, it's as simple as that. I get that Andrew is more 'problematic', but Aaron's homophobia literally makes my skin crawl bc his kind of hate is the kind I've actually dealt with. But like yeah "how dare I" hate him??

* * *

Oh, love. 

Don’t think that I’m gonna excuse his homophobia. I know what it’s like to deal with/live with hate. I know. 

But - Aaron? I headcanon that his homophobia was born out of necessity. The same way people stay closeted from family - Aaron’s homophobia was his method of survival. 

Maybe Tilda was a racist, homophobic, Islamophobic, abusive person. 

Maybe she was just abusive. 

Point being, I really don’t think he’s going to keep that opinion the more he grows, learns, and heals. 

(Maybe Nora has expanded on Aaron and confirmed that he is in fact homophobic, I’m unaware, but if not, I’m gonna stick by this theory for as long as I can.) 


	60. Chapter 60

  * Neil doesn’t know jack-shit about defending himself.
  * Can he talk his way out of a bad situation? Yeah.
  * Is he good at distracting and diffusing a bad situation? P well actually. 
  * Can he literally run the fuck away from a bad situation? _Yes_. 
  * God this loser.
  * \- Andrew 
  * It’s Renee that suggests the idea during one of her and Andrew’s sparring sessions
  * It had occurred to Andrew, esp after Baltimore
  * So he brings Neil with him to their next session and let’s him observe (w/ Renee’s permission of course) 
  * After that one time, Neil and Andrew come back and Andrew teaches Neil hand to hand combat 
  * Bc of their height, Andrew teaches Neil how to use his height to his advantage
  * And after Neil gets the hang of that Andrew gifts Neil a couple knives
  * He then proceeds to teach Neil how to use them while in a fight 
  * At this point Neil knows what he’s doing, he’s managed to pin Andrew as much as Andrew as him, they’re fairly matched
  * Andrew having the advantage bc of experience 
  * did you hear that 
  * my heart shattered
  * _my son_
  * i digress
  * Well this leads to a couple of nicks and cuts
  * It’s also lead to legit _pinning_  
  * Andrew’s backed Neil up against the wall
  * They’re both panting, a sheen of sweat over the both of them 
  * Andrew has a knife to Neil’s throat, another to his stomach 
  * Andrew’s staring at Neil’s lips, Neil’s heart’s in his throat but he notices Andrew’s attention so he smirks slightly and licks his lips real quick 
  * Andrew’s glaring, the knife at his stomach retracts, replaced by Andrew’s thigh sliding in between Neil’s legs 
  * The knife at Neil’s throat is still there
  * Neil’s still panting shallow for fear of cutting himself 
  * Andrew leans forward
  * Neil thinks he’s going to kiss him but Andrew keeps going 
  * He brings his lips to Neil’s ear and whispers, still slightly winded 
  * “- yes or no?” 
  * If Neil wasn’t panting before he sure as fuck is rn 
  * “Y - yeah - yes.” 
  * He’s seriously afraid of nicking himself
  * Andrew _licks_ his way down Neil’s jaw to his mouth
  * All while grinding his thigh into Neil’s groin 
  * The knife still to Neil’s throat 
  * Andrew you kinky motherfucker 
  * Andrew waits until he can feel Neil retracting his yes before retracting the knife 
  * Neil relaxes and his lips stop forming a “No” 
  * Andrew waits
  * No “No” is forthcoming 
  * He kisses him. 




	61. Chapter 61

bear with me…

  * neils got blisters so many blisters along the heels and balls of his feet and he usually has one or two toes bandaged bc they were bleeding from how much he runs and practices 
  * hes got dry ankles and banged up and bruised and cut knees almost all season 
  * he has that light ginger almost blond body hair covering his arms and legs and body thats so light that in the right light it looks like hes completely shaven 
  * his calves and thighs are probably the thinnest but most defined of the whole team even allison cant compete with the definition of neils upper thighs bc of how much and how fast this kid can run 
  * hes got freckles along his legs and up his back they arent in any sort of pattern theres probably not even that many theyre just spread randomly on him 
  * hes got this birthmark that looks like a bruise on his right outer thigh that he pokes and prods waiting for it to heal but never realizes that its permanent he just thinks he keeps bruising that particular place over and over again 
  * neils got a rather defined stomach as well perhaps not as much as say kevin or matt or even dan but he has a v clear 4 pack that could be a 6 pack if kevin had his way with neils diet 
  * hes got scars 
  * old and new that have just become a part of him as much as every freckle 
  * theres a gunshot wound from when he was 14 on his lower left flank other scars from where gunshots scraped past him 
  * other times when shrapnel pierced his skin
  * and multiple knife wounds, stabbings and deep cuts, each once had a story that not even andrew knew yet 
  * some had stories that neil would rather not remember himself 
  * he doesnt have a v broad chest but its still p defined as well 
  * hairless which hes not sure how he feels about esp when andrews not 
  * his arms are nice but more lean and less defined and muscular for the sake of muscles 
  * he has long arms that were a problem when he was younger and they got in the way while he was growing they still look a little out of place considering hes not v tall still but he has arms that rival nickys in length
  * he has a scar right by his collar bone where hed been stabbed and another along his neck that you couldnt see unless neil was looking directly up in good lighting 
  * from when he had had a man start to slice his throat when his mother hadnt dropped her gun fast enough even when her sons life had been on the line and deeper still even after she had dropped it 
  * he has small ears 
  * rather ears that dont stand out too much esp when he lets his curls grow out, he eventually gets quite a few piercings along his left ear leaving the other alone 
  * he has a very chiseled face his jawline very defined his cheekbones hidden behind a couple of bad scars 
  * his eyelashes and eyebrows a shade or two darker than the hair on his head and his eyes the color of an iceberg framed by long lashes and and crows feet that he gets from his mom 
  * Andrew has small feet…not necessarily _small,_ but smaller than Neil’s 
  * He’s got light brown/dirty blond body hair and this boy is hai ry 
  * hairy lil baby 
  * i digress 
  * hes got calves that should scare you, not necessarily v huge and strong like Neil’s, but so ridiculously defined even the football players are jealous 
  * his knees are soft but still scratched up and scarred just like the rest of the foxes 
  * his thighs are a little chubby bc that sugars gotta go _somewhere_
  * that somewhere being his chubby thighs and chubby butt and slightly squishy abs that shouldnt be abs but ARE bc my son exercises 
  * this boiiii
  * i love him so much idk what to do with myself 
  *  anyway 
  * hes hairy like i mentioned so i mean im not, no, no im totally saying happy trail
  * also can we talk about these idiots and the v defined V’s they both sport 
  * like 
  * stop it you two 
  * but also never stop i support and love - i digress 
  * where tf was i 
  * oh
  * the..scars 
  * Andrew’s got scars along the tops and sides of his thighs, those were all him 
  * he’s got barbed wire scars from a stint gone right and only those scars to prove it, all along his right hip and onto his stomach and the top side of his right thigh 
  * he’s got freckles, a lot of them, along the small of his back, along the back of his thighs, and down his spine, some bunched up at the back of his neck
  * hes got small hands, but pianist fingers, long and thin and knobby 
  * he’s got scars on scars on scars on his knuckles from various fights with people and the couple times he smashed a mirror with his fists
  * he wears his armbands at all times, im just…wait. a hijab. I wear a hijab at all times except when I’m home and/or around people I can take it off with, and that has nothing to do with this, but really…parallels well with the armbands 
  * wow i derailed im sorry 
  * anyway his armbands hide the worst scars
  * the ones around both his wrists, the ones that have since scabbed over but still sometimes itch that he tries his best to ignore 
  * hes got sharp, banged up elbows and 
  * broad shoulders and chest to match 
  * he probably does one handed push ups to one up Kevin bc he knows how much it pisses him off
  * he’s got a long neck, and a sharp collarbone that Neil adores
  * a necklace of hickies as proof 
  * his hair usually stay up and out of his face most of the time, but sometimes if he brushes it down it covers his eyes and he does that head jerk thing short haired people do to get it out of the way and he has soft hair and Neil loves pulling on it and running his fingers through it 
  * anyway this got way too longjust take it




	62. Chapter 62

a ~~not~~ short, incomplete list of things, experiences, people, etc. that Andrew has no choice but to remember the exact details of (abuse tw) 

  * every unwanted, unwarranted, unsolicited hand on his body that he cant rid the feeling of no matter how hard he scrubs at his skin till its raw and red and sometimes bleeding when he rubs open a scabbed over scar now needing to heal all over again 
  * every insult, every name, every last bully that he’s ever met in his life, he remembers every word of all those exchanges - he remembers back to when he used to care, when those words used to hurt, when he used to try to fight back, to stand up to those bullies - but he also remembers the exact exchange when all the fight left him and he couldnt bring himself to even acknowledge that he was being talked at, sneered at the same way as the last time, but how, this time he just. didnt care. 
  * he remembers the names of all his foster brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers no matter how hard hes tried to forget most of them he remembers their faces and their voices and the exact conversations hes had with some of them, but he also remembers the lack of conversations with others 
  * he remembers every slap…punch, kick, kiss…
  * he remembers how, when he said the _right_ thing, scripted and total lies on his part, how some of his foster mothers would smile at him just the _right_ way so he could pretend for just that second he had someone who cared 
  * he remembers how each and every one of those foster mothers let him down time after time after time after 
  * he remembers every name they called him, ever soft ‘Andrew’ when they first met him, every time if turned from soft to sharp, every time it turned from sharp to silence
  * it’s the silence that cut deeper than anything - that hurt the most
  * till it didn’t hurt at all 
  * he remembers every handshake, every pat down, every uncalled for shove from police or foster families or other authorities in his life 
  * he remembers every time he’d been but in handcuffs and every conversation he’s had in the back of a police car, or lack of conversation on his part 
  * he remembers Cass 
  * he remember officer Higgins
  * he remembers Tilda, he remembers the lack of Tilda 
  * he remembers Drake 
  * he remembers the lack of remembrance, after they started him on the drugs
  * how they messed with his brain, with his memory 
  * how even though they tried to change parts of him, his memory remained, how even through his drug-addled brain, he remembered conversations and people, and sessions with Bee and meeting the Foxes, meeting Wymack
  * he remembers feeling different in this group of people than he ever did in any foster family 
  * he remembers his deal with Aaron, the exact words that were exchanged
  * he remembers Nicky, exactly how he looked after being beat up that one night 
  * he remembers how Allison and Seth had made it clear they wanted nothing to do with him and how he had heard it all before 
  * he remembers Dan, he remembers how, through what little words she said to him, she reminded him of Cass 
  * he remembers her the night they took Matt out to Columbia, and just how close he saw her to snapping 
  * Neil makes it hard to forget Matt
  * and Kevin makes it hard to forget him, but Andrew does remember the promise they made 
  * …he remembers a lot of promises 
  * he remembers Neil 
  * he remembers ever wanted, warranted, solicited touch and kiss and and bite and caress
  * every yes and every no
  * he remembers every word the two of them exchanged after Proust 
  * he remembers Baltimore as if it were yesterday
  * he remembers every question and answer and pause in conversation and every too-fast sentence that one of them just had to get out 
  * he remembers what Neil wore to his graduation 
  * he remembers what Neil wore when Andrew came to visit the year after
  * he could verbally tell you the exact way Neil looks like in his gear, down to the grass stain on the bottom left corner of his jersey and the wrinkles from how he folds his clothes the wrong way and the way the fabric is stretched a bit too much at the back where he hangs his clothes on the hook in the locker room  
  * he remembers the feel Neil’s scars under his fingertips 
  * he remembers the feel of Neil’s scarred face under his palm
  * he remembers the cat conversation and the apartment theyd have to get to accommodate them all 
  * he remembers their first night in said apartment 
  * he remembers every damn time he has to write out a grocery list when its Neil’s turn to do the groceries and how Neil just has to yell what he needs from the kitchen as Andrew throws on a sweatshirt and leaves with a “AND CILANTRO!” being yelled out of the window  
  * he remembers when Neil stopped saying “don’t forget [xyz]” bc Neil realized that Andrew never forgot, just ignored when he wanted to 
  * he remembers every version of their “i hate you” their “100%” their “nothing” their “not wanting anything” conversations over the years
  * he remembers every promise he made and kept to Neil 
  * and every one Neil made and kept to him 
  * and yeah 
  * he still remembers the bad and the ugly and the unsightly 
  * but he has Neil to make memories with, happy and good and better 
  * he has that 
  * and he’s forever grateful that he remembers every “thank you” and soft “i love you” and softer “Andrew” 




	63. Chapter 63

> Do you know what a bad temper looks like?
> 
> \- the anger that starts as a simmer and shoots its way past rage within seconds of being triggered
> 
> \- the heat making its way up a spine and along arms until you have an iron instead of a fist
> 
> \- the danger you can feel at your fingertips, fingertips you know that have a body count beneath
> 
> Do you know what happens when you have two bad tempers within close proximity for extended periods of time?
> 
> How an argument over the better colored curtains can end with broken glass
> 
> \- or how - a grunted hello could turn into a razor bladed goodbye
> 
> Do you know how to control a bad temper?
> 
> do you know to count down from 10, but how 10 would never be enough
> 
> how - not - breathing is more effective than breathing deeply
> 
> how that pit at the bottom of your stomach, boiling hot, wont go away until hours after the damage has already been wrought  
> 
> Do you know how swiftly a temper could lay waste to the relationships you fought years to uphold?
> 
> Do you know how quickly you will regret the second of hotheadedness?
> 
> Do you know how impossible it will be to pick up the pieces that your jagged temper leaves behind?

He didn’t. 


	64. Chapter 64

prompt: andrew & neil sleepy banter & cuddling feat. the cats

* * *

 

It was the morning after semifinals. 

They had won the match against the UK the night before. They had gone out to celebrate the win after the game with the rest of the US Court. Neither of them had got drunk enough to warrant a hangover. The same could not be said of Kevin, who had passed out in their guest room in the early hours of the morning. 

It was almost noon when Neil gained enough consciousness to feel his aching muscles. As soon as he did, he groaned loud enough to make both cats stir and Andrew crack his eyes open. 

“Everything hurts.” was muttered into Neil’s pillow, mostly to himself.

“Nobody told you to try so hard, dumbass.” Andrew whispered, his voice raspy with sleep, his eyes closed. 

Neil groaned again, turning over so he was on his stomach, closer to Andrew. 

Andrew stretched, his back arching. He also turned so he was on his stomach, but his leg wrapped around the back of Neil’s thigh. 

“Mm, breakfast sounds good.” 

“Sleep sounds better.” 

“But ‘Drew…” Neil didn’t finish his sentence, nodding off for a second. He blinked awake a few seconds later, “Breakfast, yeah…breakfast.” 

Andrew wrapped his leg tighter around Neil’s thigh, “No.” It didn’t come out as a whine, but there was definitely more than one O in that No. 

“But fooood.” Absolutely a whine. 

“Sleep.” 

“Breakfast.”

“Warmth.” 

Neil _hmph’_ d, “You only want me for my body heat, asshole.” 

“Took you long enough to figure that one out.” 

Neil rolled until his legs were off the bed, “Breakfast.” He shifted the inch it took to plant a kiss against Andrew’s temple and fully got off the bed. 

It was seconds later that the cats stretched and followed Neil out, meowing for food. 

Andrew felt like he was forgetting something, but shrugged it off and went back to sleep. 

He was rudely woken not a minute later by Neil yelling his name from the kitchen, “Andrew!” 

Andrew groaned, not replying. 

“Andreww!” Neil yelled louder.

Andrew just groaned louder in response. 

He heard another groan coming from the guest room, Kevin was coming to and Neil’s volume was probably not helping his hangover. Andrew smiled in amusement. 

“Did you get the cat food!?” 

His smile slipped. 

_…shit._


	65. Chapter 65

asked: Neil would run after an ice cream truck just to get andrew something

* * *

Listen

> Neil Abram Josten would run after an ice cream truck just to get Andrew something   
> and when the driver notices, he’s gonna speed the fuck up bc what the fuck   
> and when Neil notices so, he’s gonna speed up   
> may I remind you that Neil probably, easily, at least, runs 20+ mph   
> and when he is trying, I wouldn’t put 25mph past him   
> and this driver, can’t go faster than 20 in a residential area   
> esp what with all the children   
> Neil wins that race   
> Andrew gets one of those powerpuff girls popsicles   
> It’s Bubbles   
> Nicky got the whole thing on snapchat   
> It goes viral   
> ~professional athletes,~   
> my ass 


	66. Chapter 66

listen i have a lab final in 5 hours and im running on painkillers and espresso jUst listen 

  * Andrew Minyard could snap you in half. 
  * Andrew is 5′ feet even, probably weighs somewhere between 130 and 150
    * mostly pure muscle don’t get me wrong 
  * and could bench press Neil sitting on KEvin 
  * LisTEN
  * he has the waist/chest ratio of a d o r i t o 
  * Think steve rogers but smol and angry 
  * THINK STEVE ROGERS BUT SMOL AND ANGRY 
  * Andrew is one of those people you look at and you wonder how their sleeves havent ripped
  * ~~NEIL GOT HIM A T-SHIRT THAT HAS “DON’T NEED A PERMIT FOR THESE GUNS” W/ ARROWS GOING TO HIS BICEPS AS A JOKE~~
  * ~~ANDREW WEARS IT AROUND THEIR APARTMENT ALL THE TIME~~
  * ~~PLEASE~~
  * Andrew is one of those people you dont even dare think of fighting bc you just /know/ he could pummel you to mush with his bare hands 
  * you’d thank him but that’s besides the point 
  * Andrew also keeps his arms folded a lot 
  * like he does is absentmindedly,when he doesn’t really knwow hat to do with his hands, h just folds his arms 
  * and 
  * that flexes his arms 
  * classmates are swooning 
  * there’s a betting pool, idek what about but money changes hands as soon as Andrew leaves the room
  * ONE LAST POINT IM ALMOST DONE 
  * NICKY, Aaron, KEvin, and NEil all lost to Andrew at arm wrestling 
  * it becomes a competition 
  * Matt tries his hand
  * ha pun not intended 
  * it ends on a tie
  * Matt’s red in the face
  * Allison and Renee try too, but to no avail 
  * Wymack’s nodding in thought, maybe amusement who knows
  * Dan breezes by, sits down, and beats Andrew within 14 seconds 
  * Matt starts crying 
  * Nicky’s yellin g 
  * I’m sscreaming 
  * i need to catch up on a weeks sleep in the next 4 hours and cram a semester’s worth of info _at the same time_
  * Im sorry for this mess 




	67. Chapter 67

  * it was raining 
  * bleak and gray and dreary
  * the cats were asleep 
  * so was Neil 
  * it was quiet, no sound but the patter of rain and Neil’s light snores 
  * Andrew sat on the couch, not doing, just thinking
  * The tv was off, the silence getting to him 
  * he didn’t know what was off, but something felt wrong
  * or at least, not right 
  * it was hot
  * it shouldn’t have been hot
  * but Andrew was hot 
  * he’d been thinking about Neil 
  * and the cats 
  * and the silent tv
  * in their apartment 
  * that they shared and lived in 
  * he was thinking about how the sound of Neil’s snores could have annoyed him to no end but at the moment all he could think was how peaceful they sounded
  * he was thinking about how the rain ruined their plans for the night 
  * but how it didnt matter to him bc he had plans in the first place 
  * how the cats looked so small 
  * how they looked curled up, half on top of each other 
  * he thought about their cars and how the rain was ruining all the work they’d put into washing them the weekend before 
  * how much fun they’d had 
  * he thought about Neil’s teeth, the way they peeked through his lips when he smiled no matter how hard he tried to smile close mouthed 
  * how Neil’s laugh sounded like a giggle and how it could - should have been the worst sound in the world but all he could feel was warmth all the way to the tips of his fingers the longer he thought about it 
  * he thought about how he wanted to love Neil 
  * he thought about how he _didn’t know how_  
  * It was hot 




	68. Chapter 68

Renee prays at the thanksgiving dinner table   
and the rest of the foxes dont really mind bc you do you Renee  
until Andrew also joins in   
Neil’s so…unsure..confused almost  
bc   
Andrew?  
Then Nicky swallows and joins  
Then Matt and Dan   
Wymack and Abby  
Kevin and Allison   
Bee  
Aaron  
Neil’s mouths open slightly at this point, but he bows his head  
He doesnt know if he was really praying or just following everyones lead or if anyone was even listening   
He doesn’t know if he believes in a God but the longer he thought about it and how Andrew tied into it he figured 

he could. 


	69. Chapter 69

Just hear me out im

Andrew has a really…dorky smile   
He  
He’s got not perfectly straight teeth   
and his upper lip scrunches up so his front teeth show when he’s really smiling   
Real smiles being reserved for Neil, Renee, Bee, and maybe sometimes the other Foxes  
And his smiles widen more than quirk…youfeel?   
And he has chubby checks even though his jawline could slice you in half but the candy’s gotta go somewhere…  
So   
Dimples   
That the world is denied bc it decided to not favor Andrew ever and so I don’t even blame my son   
I’m sobbing im not even sorry   
Alternatively   
Neil’s smile starts as a smirk   
And you can tell when it’s a real smile   
Bc his nose scrunches   
And his smiles and grins are v much alike bc he smiles open-mouthed   
And his front teeth always show   
And he’s a lil self conscious of the fact   
So whenever he realizes he’s smiling   
He bites down so his front teeth show even more but it effectively stops his smile   
Andrew doesn’t like that Neil is self conscious about them and makes sure Neil knows he loves his teeth and smile and face all too much   
Just   
My boys happy and healthy at a point in their lives where they can smile and it not be a mask or drug addled or both


	70. Chapter 70

  * It’s -
  * There’s -
  * They’re on the roof. 
  * It’s cold and windy and wet and gross 
  * It’s too cold to keep their hands out long 
  * Neil’s hands are in his pockets 
  * Andrew’s got a cigarette in one and the other in a pocket, he switches hands every so often 
  * It smells like rain and wet leaves 
  * And cigarette smoke and Andrew’s cologne
  * There’s no sound but the faint sound of their breaths, and every time Andrew takes a drag 
  * Quiet, calm…
  * “Are you mad at me?” 
  * Andrew shifts his gaze to Neil, he raises a brow, “No.” 
  * “Because I -” He stops short, “No?” 
  * Andrew doesn’t repeat himself. 
  * Neil looks taken aback for a second and then begins to smile 
  * He takes a breath and it stutters at the end, he lets out a giggle laced with hysteria 
  * He wasn’t sure why he’d thought Andrew would be mad at him, but hearing the ‘No’ floods such relief through him he was at a loss 
  * He starts giggling, or well, he couldn’t stop himself from giggling
  * The giggle turn into a laugh and he’s got tears streaming down a cheek, doubled over, clutching at his sides 
  * Andrew’s convinced he’s high
  * Or worse, happy 
  * But that doesn’t stop a smile from making itself known on Andrew’s face
  * Neil’s preoccupied, and no one else is on the roof with them 
  * And Neil’s laugh sounds so _warm_
  * Or, it makes Andrew feel warm…he’s not sure 
  * And so he smiles
  * Bc he thinks that maybe - he really does want nothing 




	71. Chapter 71

So I distinctly remember hype around Muslim!Renee and idk i just feel like…there ain’t no more hype? So 

  * She doesn’t wear a hijab, she choses not to
  * But she will if she’s at a mosque or praying 
  * She doesn’t wear a cross, but she does wear a gold chain with the name “الله” 
  * She doesn’t speak Arabic but she’d love to learn it some day
  * Andrew may or may not help her with that 
  * She doesn’t bet 
  * She plays exy 
  * She goes on to serve with the peace corps 
  * Where she meets her husband 
  * And gets married to him
  * And has kids with him 
  * And keeps in touch with the Foxes 
  * And comes to holiday dinners 
  * And asks Andrew to babysit when he can 
  * She’s still patient and kind and genuine
  * She still knows how to kick ass 
  * She’s still everyone’s favorite 
  * She’s still “a bad person trying very hard to be a good person” 
  * So 
  * Basically 
  * Nothing’s changed. 




	72. Chapter 72

OK, those excessively detailed headcanons are great, and I'm gonna need #1, #2, and #19 for Andreil. :)

* * *

~~~~What does their bedroom look like?

  * You walk in and there’s 2 windows right in front of you
  * theyre usually (read: always) open - the light gray, almost white in the sunlight, curtains are always pushed to the sides, billowing whenever theres a breeze 
  * There’s a queen sized bed against the left wall and the front corner, before the windows
  * The headboard is up against the wall,  the foot of the bed goes towards the left wall, where there’s the door to their closet
  * The en suite is on the wall opposite of the windows 
  * There’s a nightstand on Neil’s side, Andrew sleeps on the side next to the wall 
  * They have a floor lamp right by the door, a lamp on the nightstand, and a ceiling light in the middle of the room, their closet also has a light of its own, and obvi the bathroom 
  * (Andrew also has one of those reading lights that clip onto a headboard the nerd)
  * They have blue, white, and gray sheets. Neil was gonna go for the yellow and orange ones, Andrew the plain black and white ones, they met somewhat in the middle 
  * Their closet is a mess of colors and clothes and shoes and equipment and books, Andrew’s clothes are always put away, hung, and folded. Neil’s…not so much. 
  * Their bathroom has his & his sinks, a stand-in shower, and a tub big enough for three * ~~cough~~ *
  * Andrew keeps his things around his sink, while Neil usually keeps his in the medicine-cabinet thing on the side wall, by the lightswitch 
  * They have a dresser, without a mirror bc they have a full length in their closet, and their bathroom. It’s basically a chest of drawers, idk how to explain it, its black with silver knobs, basically just a rectangle, 6 drawers, it’s next to the closet, in front of the footboard of their bed
  * They keep an armchair and one of those big scratching posts that have places to sit for the cats by the windows bc Andrew and the cats like to sit in the sunlight 



Do they have any daily rituals?

  * Andrew makes the bed as soon as he wakes up
  * Neil wakes up before him 99% of the time, so that makes it easy for him 
  * King wakes Neil up at the same time every morning 
  * After Neil gets out of bed, Sir jumps up when it’s still warm and sleeps in with Andrew 
  * Neil feeds the cats in the morning 
  * Andrew at night 
  * They switch off cleaning the litter box 
  * Andrew loads the dishwasher at night, usually 
  * If Neil’s doing them, he washes them by hand 
  * Neil runs in the morning, they both go to the gym in the afternoon/night 
  * When theyre both on the same team, they usually take Andrew’s car to practice 
  * They make sure to eat together whenever they can, which isnt usually a lot, but they make the effort 
  * Andrew always smokes on their balcony, outside of the living room, in the afternoon, Neil sometimes makes coffee or hot chocolate when its cold out and takes them out to Andrew, it’s def routine 
  * Neil sometimes passes out on the couch after coming home from the gym, the cats will snuggle up against or on top of him and nap with him 
  * They eat ice cream after dinner bc they can, Andrew always, Neil sometimes
  * They binge watch seasons of old shows like full house and friends and pokemon and 
  * They usually shoot for a date night at least twice a month, but if they dont they dont nbd 
  * They don’t do the laundry on a schedule, just whenever it needs to be done 
  * these arent even daily what am i doing 



What do they think about before falling asleep at night?

  * fuck 
  * Neil thinks about how much time he put in at the gym
  * if he ran enough
  * how much practice he got in and if he couldve done more 
  * he thinks about whether the cats were fed and if he cleaned the litter box if he was supposed to 
  * he thinks about how he kinda needs to pee but he could probably hold it till morning 
  * he thinks about how its cold enough outside to close their windows, but he also knows how much they both like keeping them open, and how they’d both sleep better with them that way
  * He shifts and thinks about how his pillow smells like Sir and how they’ll probably need to watch the sheets sometime soon
  * When was the last time they washed the sheets? 
  * Oh.
  * ~~i’m smirking like nobodys business im not even sorry~~
  * He shifts again, now he’s facing Andrew, who’s on his back, with his left arm behind his head
  * Andrew looks over at Neil and Neil thinks how prominent Andrew’s biceps look when angled like that 
  * He thinks about how long it had been since he kissed Andrew, probably this morning, but long enough
  * He leans closer and kisses Andrew once and leans back 
  * He thinks how content he feels even if the sheets could use washing and maybe he left a mug in the sink 
  * They think about how lucky they are to have the other 
  * Neil swings a leg around Andrew’s thigh and burrows deeper into his pillow 
  * They think about how happy they are together 
  * Andrew thinks, like he does most nights, how this boy that shouldnt have meant anything, now means everything 
  * He thinksabout how he’s never letting him go 
  * And yeah
  * He thinks about how damn soft Neil’s lips are 




	73. Chapter 73

Do you ever think about how Neil is probably the first human to ever take Andrew's side in anything?

* * *

s t o p 

you asked for this angst fest my dear 

* * *

> Andrew doesn’t know what it feels like to have someone on his side.
> 
> Andrew doesn’t know what it’s like to be taken on his word.
> 
> Andrew Minyard doesn’t know what it’s like to be _trusted_.
> 
> Along came Neil Josten and it was “I won’t be like them.”
> 
> It was “I won’t let you let me be.”
> 
> Neil took his word.
> 
> Neil believed him.
> 
> Neil never doubted Andrew.
> 
> Andrew hated him.
> 
> Neil was the first person that Andrew didn’t have to tiptoe around.
> 
> Neil was the first person to ask “What?” instead of “Why?”
> 
> Neil was “Are you ok?” and not “Are you sure?”
> 
> Neil was “Yes.” when everyone else was “No.”
> 
> And when Neil was “No.”
> 
> Andrew didn’t have to worry that he heard “Yes.”
> 
> Andrew couldn’t hate Neil.
> 
> Andrew didn’t hate Neil.
> 
> “I hate you.”


	74. Chapter 74

  * Erik wants to adopt. 
  * Nicky is ecstatic, he loves kids, he knows Erik does too, and he know Erik would be a great dad 
  * But Nicky isn’t so sure of himself 
  * He thinks back to how he took care of the twins for however long he did
  * He thinks to how cold and bitter they both are 
  * He thinks how they’re both in therapy 
  * Not bc of him, no - but some things Nicky knows he could have prevented 
  * He thinks how much better off they could have been if he were a better guardian 
  * If they had someone else 
  * Not him. 
  * He thinks, if he were to ever have a kid, how good of a dad could he be?
  * How bad he could be at parenting a child 
  * How unfit he is to parent a child.  
  * He doesn’t tell Erik, he can’t disappoint him like that, he won’t. 
  * He’ll - he’ll read parenting books and take courses and he’ll learn…
  * (… _but isn’t that what he said he’d do for the twins?_ )
  * Nicky’s not gonna go to Erik, he can’t go to the twins, Matt and he weren’t that close, Kevin would probably be busy…so he calls Neil. 
  * Neil doesn’t pick up 
  * Nicky calls again, it goes to voicemail, again 
  * But Nicky just…Nicky just needs to get the words out
  * So he leaves a voicemail 
  * He tells Neil everything he won’t tell Erik, what he can’t say to the twins 
  * He tells Neil how Erik wants to adopt and how much he loves him, but how utterly terrified he is of the prospect of fucking up another child and how he can’t do that how he never wants to have to live with the feeling of not being good enough again how he - how he can’t. 
  * And it’s maybe an hour later, Neil and Andrew are driving home after a movie, Neil notices he has a couple missed calls, he sees the voicemail, he plays it on speaker, bc it’s just Nicky. It’s just Andrew. 
  * Neil goes to close it as soon as he gets the gist of what Nicky’s saying, but Andrew takes his eyes off the road to shoot a glare at Neil
  * Neil purses his lips and complies
  * They listen to their Nicky, the Nicky that’s always happy and cheerful and okay, break down over the phone over a matter not at all light-hearted 
  * The voicemail ends and the rest of the drive is spent in silence, both of them lost in thought 
  * It’s later that night that Andrew gets up out of bed and takes a cigarette and his phone out to their balcony 
  * Neil’s still awake, but he doesn’t stop Andrew. 
  * It’s a short conversation 
  * Nicky picks up, wary and confused as to why Andrew was calling him, but he wouldn’t miss a call from his twins for anything 
  * Neil can’t hear anything through the closed doors, but he’s ok with that 
  * “Andrew?”   
“Don’t fucking blame yourself, dumbass.”   
“I - what?”   
Andrew breathes for a second, “It wasn’t your fault.”  
Nicky’s lip trembles but he bites it and doesn’t say anything.   
Andrew takes a drag, when Nicky isn’t forthcoming, “You’ll be a great dad. Me and Aaron weren’t your fault. Stop it.”   
Nicky gulps, his nose burning, “I - yeah.”   
“Go talk to your husband.” Andrew says it dismissively, but keeps the phone to his ear.   
Nicky hears the dismissal, he knows how Andrew snaps his phone shut as soon as he has the last word. That doesn’t stop Nicky from whispering a shaky, “ _Thank you_.” on his end, even though he knew Andrew wouldn’t hear, before hanging up.   
Andrew nods to himself, gently closes his phone, and takes another drag. 




	75. Chapter 75

forgive me

> can you imagine the soft kisses
> 
> the barely there but definitely there brushes of lips against lips 
> 
> the closed mouth presses that are just as important as every other kind of kiss 
> 
> the not even kisses, just breathing the same air kisses 
> 
> the corner of the mouth kisses 
> 
> the kisses that are just a pressing of mouths together bc one or both of them are in a hurry 
> 
> the kisses that bring tears to eyes bc they mean so much more than just a kiss 
> 
> the kisses that take no amount of effort 
> 
> the early morning kisses that wake one of them up
> 
> the late night kisses that end up with one of them falling asleep on the other
> 
> the kisses that taste like tears 
> 
> the kisses that taste like some type of love
> 
> alternatively 
> 
> the kisses that are nothing but teeth 
> 
> the kisses that are more hands than lips 
> 
> the kisses that  _hurt_  
> 
> the kisses that bruise and swell 
> 
> the swollen lips and hickeys that arent going anywhere anytime soon 
> 
> the kisses that bite 
> 
> the kisses that pull and scratch and push 
> 
> the kisses that travel 
> 
> the kisses that shouldnt be classified as kisses 
> 
> the kisses that make hair stand on end  
> 
> the kisses that taste like electricity 
> 
> the kisses that taste like some type of love 


	76. Chapter 76

Neil’s a hoe for all things Fall 

  * Pumpkin spice.
  * He didn’t even know he’d like pumpkin, he’d never tried it before
  * But Nicky had bought him a latte before class once, he’d drank it and didn’t think much of it
  * until he finds himself at the campus Starbucks ordering a venti 
  * again 
  * and again 
  * And I mean Andrew doesn’t mind the cinnammon-y kisses 
  * Sweaters
  * Beige/brown/light brown/green/gray/o r a n g e alll the fall colors look good on him
  * his skin color, hair, and eyes ( ~~and stature ngl~~ ) make any sweater look good 
  * Andrew’s furious 
  * Everything Orange
  * Like sweaters and leaves and drinks and the chocolate and just 
  * orange 
  * this nerd 
  * i hate him 
  * Halloween??? 
  * surprise surprise Neil loves dressing up 
  * and more than that 
  * he enjoys being someone other than himself, and All Hallow’s Eve is the perfect excuse 
  * He’s never had the chance to before now, at least, not since he was a child in Baltimore 
  * So the Foxes make sure to go all out and throw a party and yes people got smashed and things were smashed and yes there are pictures no Andrew’s never gonna live it down 




	77. Chapter 77

I find it funny people think Andrew has to wait till Neil to think “I’m so gay” 

  * Neil gets out of the shower, his hair wet and his shirt damp bc he didn’t dry off before putting it on 
  * Neil takes his helmet off in the middle of practice, his hair tied back with his bandana, sweat dripping down his neck 
  * Neil takes his shirt off to sleep 
  * Neil gets dressed for a night out, coughskinnyjeanscough
  * Neil’s due for a haircut 
  * Neil driving 
  * Neil driving with sunglasses on 
  * Neil driving with sunglasses on and the windows down 
  * Neil biting his lip while lost in thought, a cigarette held between his fingers like a pencil 
  * Neil blowing rings absentmindedly, not even focused on the cigarette 
  * Neil studying in the morning with the sunlight shining on him
  * Neil just before he wakes in the morning 
  * Neil after he wakes up, his blue eyes squinting against the sunlight filtering through their blinds 
  * Neil with his hair styled up for next years banquet thing that Allison helped him with 
  * Neil in a tux at Matt and Dan’s wedding 
  * Neil. 
  * (And I mean Andrew is allowed to look at Kevin and Matt and even Jeremy and think “Gay. Yes. I’m gay. Def gay.”)  




	78. Chapter 78

**Anonymous** asked:

Allison would practice running in heels bc catwoman (I did this when I was younger). Dan and Renee sometimes join her. I just shared this bc I figured it was a nice thought

* * *

She’d mastered the art by middle school. 

  * Dan and Renee absolutely join her, bc they too, had mastered running in high heels just as fast as if they were wearing sneakers  
  * Dan bc work and Renee bc Allison thought it’d be fun to teach her 
  * Allison has probably  ~~definitely~~  also learned how to aim a kick high enough so that the heel could be used to stab…which she may or may not have used before  
  * That was a talent neither Dan nor Renee had the legs for 
  * To raise awareness of campus sexual assault - the three of them played a game in high heels 
  * It was Allison’s idea, but after the boys found out, they all practiced in heels and the game after the first, _100%_ of the Foxes played in heels. 
  * they lost that one, but it didn’t matter to them 
  * bc it was a week later that Jeremy Knox and _most_  of the USC Trojans came out to play in high heels of their own 
  * they won that game
  * Allison had never been more proud 
  * When our girls get together and wear high heels out, they have less of an air of femininity and more…strength, not - to say that femininity can’t be strength, but yo, guys back away from them and all the girls drool 
  * They will kill a man and walk over his corpse in said heels
  * My babes are so strong 
  * so powerful 
  * must be protected at all costs 



Tysm for sharing! I don’t get to talk about my daughters enough haha 


	79. Chapter 79

Neil was giggling. Matt and Nicky were squealing over how cute he sounded, Dan was rolling her eyes at him, and Allison was rolling her eyes at all of them, Renee smiling to herself.

All of a sudden he stopped, looking wide-eyed at Matt, “Matt are you my friend?”   
“‘Course, bud.”   
Neil smiled wobbly, “Thanks - thank you for-”   
“Neil.” Kevin’s voice came from the corner of the room. Neil looked to Kevin then back at Matt. He smiled at Matt and went to go look for Andrew.

He didn’t see him, but did catch a glimpse of blond hair in the crowd of Vixens and athletes. “Andrew! Andrew! Andrew!”   
Aaron turned, a scowl already formed. As soon as Neil recognized that he wasn’t looking at Andrew, he let out a giggle. A giggle that turned into a laugh and a laugh that escalated and soon he was almost doubled over.   
Kevin came over and put a hand on Neil’s back. “Let’s go, dumbass.”   
Neil straightened, wiping at his eyes where tears had gathered.

It was as they were leaving that Neil had an epiphany. He yelled “Andrew and - mmph”  
Neil’s announcement was cut off by Kevin’s hand clamping over his mouth.   
“We’re leaving.”   
“But, Kevin! My friends!”  
“Neil.”   
Neil gasped, “Allison, wanna know what bet you’re gonna lose!” He yelled towards their group and started towards them.   
Kevin sighed, then pulled Neil’s arm back. When he resisted Kevin rolled his eyes, moving a stride in front of Neil.   
“Must you make this difficult.” He muttered before ducking and grabbing Neil around his stomach and hauling him over his shoulder.   
Neil squealed whether in delight or surprise, he didn’t know.

Neil’s giggle was the last thing the room heard before the door closed behind Kevin’s retreating form.


	80. Chapter 80

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> praise kink???

Anon : So I have this little headcanon that Andrew secretly (not so secret to Neil, but Andrew would rather die or kill than admit it) has a praise kink and he enjoys Neil being vocal in bed. He especially loves it when Neil is so close that all he yells is yes and Andrew's name.

* * *

Well

  * Neil doesn’t even know 
  * I mean, well, he knows that Andrew likes…vocal…approval…
  * But at the same time, he doesn’t really get that a praise kink is a thing until 
  * “You like it. I like that you like it.” And Neil’s staring at Andrew like did you - are you- do you-
  * And Andrew’s like I can’t believe that you haven’t figured it out you asshole 
  * And so Neil 
  * this little fucking shit 
  * i love him oh my god
  * purposely will either 
  * a. stay quiet (sometimes only. it’s hard not to be loud for Neil) and tease Andrew bc Andrew knows if Neil didn’t know, he would most def not be quiet
  * or b. praise when theyre not going at it 
  * as in, “Fuck, Andrew this food is so good. It’s delicious! Matt, don’t you think so?” And Matt’s also o b l i v i o u s to Andrew leveling a glare at Neil and Neil smirking like he knowws 
  * and “You are so goddamn good at defending the goal, babe. Like, I don’t know anyone with the level of your skill that could defend the goal like you do…Andrew you’re so fucking good at defending the fucking goal.” 
  * Kevin’s looking over at Neil like he just grew another head bc what the fuck, we know Andrew’s a good goalie, shut about it gosh
  * Andrew’s keeping a boner down by sheer force of will  
  * And w hen they are going at it and Neil’s not trying to keep quiet hoo boy 
  * Neil bites at Andrew’s collar like usual but also will…worship Andrew’s body at the same time and Andrew’s gonna fucking murder Neil 
  * And when Andrew’s kissing Neil, Neil’s doesn’t hold back the “Yes”s and “Fuck”s and “More”s and “Andrew”s and “There”s and “Shit”s and “God”s and…have I made my point? I think so. 
  * Andrew grits his teeth like no if course this isnt having an effect on me what are you talking about what no not at all what 
  * And when “Neil is so close that all he yells is yes and Andrew’s name.” Andrew knows that it’s always yes with Neil. 




	81. Chapter 81

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew's hot yo

YALLL

    * I cannot believe we always talk about how hot Neil is but we always fail to remember that Andrew?? Is probably??also really attractive??? 
    * I mean, he’s described as not looking “like much” but I don’t think that has anything to do with his looks, more his stature 
    * And we know he’s short - his racquet is taller than him ( ~~oh my god someone draw this i will love you forever~~ ) but since when has height determined how attractive one is? 
    * I mean, can you just…imagine the size of his biceps, I mean I wouldnt go as far as to say he has Steve Rogers size biceps but I mean 
    * And we know he has broad shoulders, probably much broader than Aaron’s and I mean - Andrew’s fucking built. 
    * And his f ace?? He totally has high cheekbones - you know the ones
    * And the narrow face…you know like the ones where he don’t need no contour, its just na tural???
    * And fuck he has h a zel eyes that shine gold in the sunlight like some sort of fucking disney prince what the fuck is this 
    * A Nd he probably has the softest hair - blond, blond hair, that I’m sure also shines in the sunlight and probably looks ethereal in the moonlight 
    * ~~let me live~~
    * He probably does that thing where instead of brushing a hand through his hair he just like …how the fuck  do i explain this, you know the thing guys do when they shake their head a certain way to get their hair out of their eyes? like he’ll throw his head to the side and his hair will just?? magically fix itself and Neil’s staring and Andrew doesnt give it a second thought like its nothing - its nothing! 
    * I’m so worked up about this 
    * He also (canonically? I dont think so) wears skinny jeans and sFLIKADN 
    * ANDREws c a l v e s need i say more fuck
    * also, unlike NEil, Andrew knows exactly how to dress, he knows colors and styles and fa shion he knows i know he knows my son god 
    * and just 
    * Andrew being as attractive, if not more than his boyfriend and just us appreciating the fact 
    * ;i[ojlk,



* * *

 

[A continuation of how hot Andrew is oops ](https://hatehateslove.tumblr.com/post/150234734411/yalll-i-cannot-believe-we-always-talk-about-how)

  * Photoshoots. 
  * dear lord have mercy 
  * Just Andrew having multiple brand deals that require him to model and maybe possible act 
  * bc 
  * fuck 
  * all I can see is those gatorade commercials where there’s athletes working out or playing and they’re just d r e n c h e d and it cuts to a close up of their faces and you see the determination and concentration on their faces and murder me honestly
  * anyway 
  * Andrew doing photoshoots where the cameramen/directors/what have you don’t have to direct Andrew at all, bc he’s so?? fucking??? photogenic?? 
  * Like Andrew usually has a v bored/annoyed look on when he’s gotta be doing these, but the way he just…exudes this aura of lethality - the magazine companies adore it, no matter how much Andrew scares them
  * And yes, Aaron might get a few deals when he’s still in school, but everyone can tell the difference between them - not bc of their physical appearance and not even the armbands - but just how Andrew holds himself, the aura I was talking about vs Aaron 
  * So basically Andrew’s rolling his eyes and got a grumpy expression on - which Neil always sees through when he sees Andrew’s face on the cover of a sports magazine 
  * He nails the “holier-than-thou” look without even trying 
  * But the way he looks to fans that can’t see through the bored expressions is, i imagine, an almost…who am i kidding, it’s absolutely a smoulder god Andrew what the fuck 
  * And yes yEs yes he totally does the no shirt, just armbands look and Neil’s dying, Nicky screamed, Kevin’s crying and I’m running around like a headless chicken bc _holy_ _fuck_  
  * And more of the racquet that is taller than him (thank you again [@rocketshipdebri](https://tmblr.co/mqEuAGtqGHRRH7qHgW4RkPQ) for drawing that masterpiece) and pictures where the angles show just how much taller it is than him but then immediately underlining Andrew’s stats and what he can do with that racquet and just how fucking legit this 5 foot angry smol is im 
  * and of fucking course 
  * When Neil and Andrew have shoots together bc I’m sure they both have a Nike deal and just…fuck me 
  * They do the one where theyre both in full gear, this one’s Neil’s fav bc Andrew was supposed to be looking at the camera but he’s looking at Neil and that’s the one they use for the cover and i love death and dying 
  * ANd they ihobn;ojlknm
  * They’re both attractive, we’ve established this - which come onnnn, leads to brand deals with like Ralph Lauren fr fr 
  * And theyve got one where Andrew’s lounging on a couch and Neil’s behind it, looking real threatening like straight into the camera and jsut lkjhlkj 
  * Jeans for American Eagle fuck these two losers are everywhere 
  * Just Andrew’s got the looks and Neil compliments him v well, what with the hazel/blond / blue/ginger thing they got going on and 
  * im deceased 



* * *

 


	82. Chapter 82

So I was thinking

  * how andrews hands are probably, definitely smaller than neils
  * and even though theyre smaller he has the longer, pianist fingers, and the nails that always look good
  * but theyre also scarred and each scar has a story
  * of…loyalty and pain and love and misunderstanding and unfairness and hate and family and not family and knives and not knives and…
  * and how neils got the same size fingers, but his palm is oversized and his fingers are just..thicker, and more scarred and callused
  * and…redder? more freckles and his knuckles stand out without straining
  * and Neils nails are always bitten down and usually at least 4 out of 10 are bandaged bc he’s bit them down to bleed and sometimes he had his knuckles bandaged bc he’s punched someone or somethinf or just hurt his hand playing
  * and how he has similar scars to andrews
  * but theyve got comepletly different storries
  * how his scars have, not only a different story, but a different…name, a different persona, bc he wasnt always neil josten…but …but andrew wasnt always andrew minyard either…
  * and how andrews hands are…almost…so…pure…?? idk if thats what i mean, but like….theyre clean…and smooth…but but but…but they have the ability to kill, to crush, to destroy…like a sword, so pretty when you look at it, but deadly when used right
  * and how neils got burns, some faded, some not, some new, some old, how he has more freckles on his left hand then his right and…how theyre hairier than andrews and how his pinky broke when he was younger but set wrong
  * so now he cant flex it so its straight, always crooked, and how andrew loves hooking his pinky with that one
  * and how…if they put their hands on each others, andrews hands drown in neils, but if they hold hands with their fingers laced, its equal bc andrew has the same length fingers
  * and how neil sometimes wears black or dark dark blue nail polish bc he likes it and how he imagines andrews nails would look if he would put the black one one…bc he has such pretty nails, never too long or too short, the right size and somehow alwasy filed to perfection without even trying
  * and if andrew would just…try the black polish, how his hands would look so…elegant and…fierce? powerful. bc andrew already has that power in his hands, but the polish would…just…underline the pure…danger…than andrew holds in his hands…



Yeah….

For the ever so lovely [@theravenhunters](https://tmblr.co/mQDkQwvjIOERz-X3Bcr4Rxw)


	83. Chapter 83

Bc I can see this happening too clearly for my liking 

  * So it’s the girls’ last year and our Foxes are close enough that nights out are commonplace
  * They’d just won a home game against the Raven’s
  * They’re all enjoying they drinks, the upperclassmen and Neil are dancing, Kevin’s shitfaced, Aaron’s making out with Katelyn, Nicky and Andrew are people watching by Kevin
  * Andrew gets up to watch Neil, Neil notices Andrew from downstairs and gestures for him to come down so Andrew takes another shot and meanders his way down, he doesn’t dance, but he stays by Neil 
  * A while after Nicky shouts down the stairs, something about Kevin and - Ravens?
  * He’s gesturing wildly, Andrew makes out the words “ - took him when I wasn’t looking…they, they’re gonna hurt him!” 
  * Andrew locks eyes with Neil, they both have matching murderous expressions, but Andrew
  * Andrew’s vision is tunnelling, the room spinning
  * He can’t do anything, he - he cares, he wants to protect his own, but, but he can’t -
  * Andrew can’t go back
  * He can’t.
  * And Neil doesn’t need to hear him say it to know exactly what Andrew’s thinking, and so Neil goes
  * Neil makes his way through the crowd exuding this aura that has people backing away, steering clear of him
  * Roland’s got the club under control. No one’s called 911 yet, Nicky’s shouts not having alerted too many people, save the Foxes
  * Neil gets to Nicky. Allison, Renee, Dan, and Matt behind him
  * Nicky’s telling them about Ravens that he fought off while more took Kevin
  * Neil turns, “Matt, Allison, Dan - downstairs. Renee with me.” The Foxes nod, splitting up to search.
  * Neil looks to Renee and she nods. They both knew that Kevin wouldn’t be inside, so they head outside and split up at the door, both trusting the other to be able to take care of themselves.
  * Neil’s the one that sees them first, in the back alley, 4 Ravens and a barely conscious Kevin laying by their feet. He had a split lip, a bruised eye, and blood running from a head wound. He was curled in on himself, the Ravens still landing kicks to his stomach.
  * As soon as he saw Neil, he uncurled the slightest bit, but another brutal kick had him emptying his stomach on the asphalt
  * Neil deftly unsheathed a knife from his armband, plunging into the nearest Raven’s thigh. She screamed.
  * Renee made it in time to see Neil make his move, then saw the state Kevin was in - She debated for a second before booking it to Kevin’s side
  * With one Raven down and the other 3′s attention on him, Neil had his work cut out for him
  * He fought more than used his knives, the Ravens weren’t expecting a fight, and when they realized he was armed, they only stayed bc they outnumbered him
  * But then Matt barreled his way to Neil’s side, Dan and Allison a ways behind him
  * Allison called 911 for the injuries
  * Dan made it to Kevin and Renee
  * Dan was the one that turned to the defeated Ravens when Neil and Matt were done with them
  * “We’re calling 911. You say there was a fight. You say you didn’t see any faces. You say it was your fault. And maybe we won’t report your asses to the NCAA.” She didn’t spare them a second look, turning back to Kevin.
  * “Abby can take care of him, Neil, Matt - let’s go.”




	84. Chapter 84

****Anon asked: Neil knowing his way round knives + the Foxes. I'm a fan of Neil getting kinda scary sometimes.

* * *

  s  a  m  e

See this [ask](https://hatehateslove.tumblr.com/post/148726059161/neil-doesnt-like-knives-he-associates-knives) if you have any questions about knives before we start

No seriously, go on. I’ll wait.

…now that that’s hopefully out of the way

  * Neil carries his knives the way Andrew does, in his armbands, 2 in his right, 1 in his left and sometimes 1 more just in case strapped to his ankle
  * Andrew and Renee have taught him everything he knows, so it’s new
  * but Neil’s a fast learner
  * and knives are a weapon
  * and weapons have always come easy to Neil
  * ~~no im not fucking crying what~~
  * Neil doesn’t use his knives much 
  * There’s probably only been 2 instances in the last year that they made their presence known 
  * The first time bc Andrew was in trouble, and Neil didn’t have the patience or the temper to think things through
  * No one but Andrew knew about this incident. 
  * Then there was the time Nathaniel made himself known
  * It was after a Ravens-Foxes home game
  * Riko and Kevin and Neil had been brought up - their relationship, his death, their families
  * Neil had been exhausted, the fight drained out of him, all his energy spent on winning the game 
  * So naturally, his temper, exhaustion, and the words combined to effectively shut Neil down, leaving Nathaniel to wreak havoc - and he did. 
  * They were in the parking lot of Fox Tower
  * The twins in their rooms, Kevin shitfaced, and Nicky inside 
  * Drinks had been drunk 
  * Punches had been thrown 
  * Words and insults had been used 
  * Nathaniel had no patience once they started blaming Riko’s death on him 
  * The knives glinting in the streetlight was the only forewarning that the upperclassmen got before Nathaniel had a Raven backed up with a knife to his throat. No one moved for a second, their minds trying to process the scene before them
  * “Neil!” That was Dan, Nathaniel didn’t hear it. 
  * “Say it again. I fucking dare you.” Nathaniel sneered
  * The Raven blinked rapidly, not saying another word, breathing shallowly around the knife
  * “Hey!” That was another Raven, coming to his teammates aid. 
  * Nathaniel grit his teeth, before knocking the first boy out with a blow to the temple, then turned to the next boy
  * Nathaniel smirked, “Sorry, Dan. He was being bothersome. Won’t happen again,” he walked towards the other Raven, “I promise.” he finished just as he backed this boy against a car without even trying. 
  * No one said anything, everyone just watching in resigned horror as this stranger went about his way
  * He knocked the second Raven out too before the other Ravens decided that they didn’t want to try their hand at facing this side of Josten 
  * “Neil -” This was Matt, “Neil -” 
  * Nathaniel turned to face Boyd, he didn’t say anything just stared at him blankly, and that was too much for Matt, “Snap out of it, Neil. This isn’t you.” 
  * Nathaniel stared a while too long, still not saying anything. It was bothering Matt more than he’d care to admit. 
  * It was Renee that made her way towards Nathaniel 
  * She outstretched a hand, reaching for his shoulder, Nathaniel watched her closely, a skeptical brow raised, ready to strike.
  * When she was close enough, she stopped, “Abram.” Andrew had told her how to talk Neil down, he’d been the only one that had seen Nathaniel come out after Baltimore, but he’d made sure that someone knew how to, should he not be there. 
  * “Abram.” She repeated a little louder. “You’re name is Neil Abram Josten.” her voice was small, unsure if she could help Neil, worried that only Andrew could talk him down, “Neil, Abram. It’s us. It’s just us…” at her “You’re safe.” Nathaniel’s shoulders slumped
  * “Oh” Renee stepped forward, “Neil, it’s you.” She brought her arms around his shoulders, wrapping him in a tight hug, supporting him.
  * He buried his face in her shoulder, his shoulders shaking from exhaustion or relief, he wasn’t sure 
  * “Sorry. I - I’m sorry, sorry, I -” 
  * “You’re safe.” 




	85. Chapter 85

Since I did that horrible chore yesterday afternoon in 89-90 heat (Florida) who do you think mows the lawn (if and when they actually get a lawn) neil or andrew? I think it would be neil since andrew wears all that black and he either likes getting heat stroke or doesn't bother doing it....

* * *

(im sorry to everyone waiting for me to get my ass in gear and actually write/post their prompts i swear im working on them and they will all be posted)

* * *

 

I actually can v vividly see Neil and Andrew, years down the line - 

  * Living in a house that they rent bc they move around too much to buy
  * With their cats and maybe a dog
  * maybe a little human too who knows 
  * not me 
  * And it’s like Summer, but close enough to Fall that it’s getting chilly 
  * And their lawn is a mess of weeds and over grown bushes
  * Andrew’s garden is in disarray, which he has only bc Bee told him it might be therapeutic 
  * At least that’s what he’s told Neil
  * Neil doesn’t buy it 
  * And there are cat and dog toys strewn across their backyard
  * All the pets have stashes of things that belong to Andrew and Neil, some of their neighbors, and even stuff the Foxes leave behind/misplace when they visit
  * And I see Neil in a t-shirt and jeans, Andrew matching him, on their hands and knees, just pulling weeds and planting seeds and picking up toys and raking leaves and mowing the lawn - 
  * Which Andrew usually does bc he hates raking and makes Neil do all the hard work while the machine does most of his for him
  * I can see Andrew grumbling about the heat and the work when he could be napping or eating cake
  * And Neil smiling at him regardless bc Andrew’s got grass stains on his knees and and mud on his cheek and sweat drenching his back and grass stuck in his hair and dirt under his fingernails 
  * and Neil has never looked at Andrew and thought “Home.” as fast as he did then 




	86. Chapter 86

Yo, I heard you're taking TFC headcanon prompts! I've been pondering how Neil would react if any harm came to Andrew in the course of protecting him. (Not necessarily when he was "keeping his promise" of protection from the Moriyamas, but just in general- if Andrew was hurt in some way defending Neil.) I'm thinking mild-moderate harm, not super-angsty major life-changing injury. But how would Neil react in that situation, do you think?

* * *

It’s endearing that you have to specify “not super-angsty major life-changing injury” bc everyone knows Bia’d go that route, but don’t think you’re not gonna get super-angsty hc’s anyways lmao 

* * *

 

  * Andrew likes picking fights
  * He will probably go out of his way to pick a fight with someone that he _thinks_ has the _potential_ to fuck things up 
  * This kids just as much of an instigator as Neil, we know this 
  * But I’m thinking Neil doesn’t always appreciate the way Andrew doesn’t care about his own self 
  * Andrew will throw himself at a 6 foot something backliner without a second thought if he thought she was going to hurt Neil 
  * He’s literally pulled his knives out on nights out 
  * Andrew knows his way around a fight, he knows how to use his height to his advantage, how to beat someone up, how to threaten without violence - he can handle himself 
  * He’s punched and kicked and threatened and cut any sort of harm that comes Neil’s way
  * and Neil loves Andrew 
  * He wouldn’t have him any other way
  * But the second Andrew can’t take care of himself or puts himself into harms way that he won’t get out of unscathed - Neil gets scary
  * I don’t mean Nathaniel-scary 
  * But I mean Nathaniel-scary. 
  * The second he deduces that Andrew’s going to be hurt/is hurt he gets the most thunderous expression on his face 
  * and yeah he’s only 5′3″ but you wouldn’t think so when he gets like this 
  * I’m talking flashing eyes and toothy grins right before he pulls a knife out 
  * I’m talking Percy Jackson level furious
  * Kevin almost pissed himself the first time he saw the change happen in Columbia 
  * Matt had to talk him down after a backliner illegally body-checked Neil, costing her a red card, it was at the very end of the game anyway and she hadn’t seen Andrew’s racket quick enough - but her teammates did and there was a pile-up and maybe broken bones ~~who knows not me no god i don’t need to write this hush~~
  * ahem
  * Neil hadn’t noticed, still shaking off the check, but when he’d turned back, Andrew wasn’t at the goal and there was a pile of atleast 6 bodies, Matt and Nicky near the top - both having run to help Andrew was soon as they noticed the other team rush towards him 
  * Neil could only stare in confusion, not comprehending until the refs cleared the pile up and Andrew was revealed at the bottom, cradling his left arm - Neil saw red 
  * Matt talked him out of committing murder, but Neil wasn’t sure if he wouldn’t have, had Matt not been there.
  * Whenever Neil gets like that, Andrew realizes he may have overstepped, but it doesn’t stop him from doing it again
  * Neil’s also accepted it and can’t really do anything about his temper, the one that flares and puts him in predicaments he knows he couldn’t avoid if he tried 
  * Neil knows how he gets, how dangerous, how lethal - he knows he has the potential to hurt just as much, if not more than Andrew - but chooses not to
  * It’s only when he’s left with no choice that his worst comes out 




	87. Chapter 87

**Anonymous** asked:

so i know everyone loves neil calling andrew love in his british accent but i also fucking love thinking about neil calling andrew mi amor (my love/love) in spanish <3

* * *

Y’all I don’t understand how this kid can speak French, German, English, and Russian and have been on the run in Europe and America and not know Spanish. How.

So. Imma hc that Neil picked Spanish up as a kid. But he never realized until way later when he went to the grocery store with Kevin and the cashier just starts a conv in Spanish and Neil just?? rolls with it?? Just dropping straight up colloquial Spanish bc that was the only one he’d been around as a kid. 

And Kevin gets into the car after said grocery run and is like yelling as Neil about why he didn’t tell them he spoke Spanish and NEil’s like? What?? I dont?? ANd KEvin’s like bruh… 

* * *

 

ahem. 

  * Andrew hates Neil. 
  * Neil will just drop pet names in any given language
  * And Andrew. Doesn’t. Understand.
  * He doesn’t understand the French or the Spanish, at least
  * and it is driving him mad 
  * Usually he’ll just ignore Neil or roll his eyes and discreetly look them up later 
  * But when Neil rolls his r’s and lowers his voice Andrew can’t help but bite the inside of his cheek 
  * Once Neil realizes he can in fact speak and understand Spanish he makes sure to use it any time he can, especially when he’s with Andrew 
  * They’ll be at the mall and he’ll strike up a conversation with a stranger while holding Andrew’s hand just so Andrew has no choice but to squeeze Neil’s hand to tell him _enough_  
  * Nicky Dies when he finds out, it drives the twins insane when Neil and Nicky speak a mix of Spanish and German and English that they can’t keep up with 
  * ( ~~Neil and Nicky bonding bc they’re the only two from the Monsters that speak Spanish~~ )  
  * Andrew doesn’t really care about the fact that Neil can speak Spanish, it’s just when he can’t understand that annoys him
  * Also when Neil uses it when it’s only them two, at home, alone 
  * no im not tryna say anything hush 
  * Mi amor is probably the worst one Neil could use because Andrew _hates_ that word love almost as much as he _hates_ Neil 
  * So the few times Neil does use mi amor Andrew can’t really get mad at Neil
  * He just scrunches his brow and 
  * almost 
  * not really 
  * kind of 
  * sort of
  * but not exactly
  * pouts at Neil 



also minor detail just i m a g i n e Neil saying mi amor in a british accent ~~i mean murder me~~


	88. Chapter 88

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Foxes fav books?

**Anonymous** asked:

Dan's favorite book is the handmaiden's tale (feminist af) , Allison's is pride and prejudice (also feminist af) , (I have a feeling Renee is happy with ghost story books but is in no way less feminist af), Nicky's favorite series is the percy jackson series, Aaron's is harry potter, kevin's fav. is (if I'm going to be creative and not say history or exy) then mythology from around the world, and Matt's is great expectations.

 

anon: do you agree with my headcanon of the foxes’ favorite books? What do you think they are?

* * *

(I FEEL SO UNEQUIPPED TO ANSWER THIS I’M SORRY)

  * I haven’t read The Catcher in the Rye, The Handmaiden’s Tale, and (all of) Pride and Prejudice. 
  * Having said that…
  * Kevin cried for 2 hours reading TSoA. 
  * Aaron _adores_ HP. He is Ravenclaw through and through. He has the boxed set and all the movies. 
  * Nicky’s fav character is Leo Valdez (HOO not PJO ik but honestly same difference) and then it’s a tie between Nico and Reyna. 
  * Renee probably highkey fangirled watching Ghostbusters. 
  * Matt…I’m actually gonna have to say AToTC has to be Matt’s fav Dickens novel - his fav character (im biased sue me) would be Sydney Carton. ~~Like come on~~  
  * I feel like Allison would also hk be into sci-fi/horror like Renee, Allison’s fav author being Mary Shelly.
  * Dan is a space nerd oh my god, give her all the Star Wars. But also she’s def into fantasy, LotR is her and Matt’s fav, they’ve marathoned the entire Hobbit movies and all of the LotR’s - only after Dan made Matt read _everything_.
  * Neil is a slut for all things Marvel - the comics, the movies, the everything. 
  * (He bought a Cap comic when he was young that he’s read hundreds of times, over and over, through the years, on the run, it’s ripped and frayed and old and stained but Neil loves it to death and will never throw it away) 
  * Andrew. I have a hc out that’s along the lines of Andrew being as much of a bookworm as Will Herondale (if you’ve read TID you know what I’m talking about) or Tessa Gray, she works just as fine. 
  * Point being, I don’t think Andrew has a favorite book. There are too many he hasn’t read, too many yet to be written. If you mean a book he’s read over and over, I’m going to have to say - Harry Potter. But not the series, just TCoS…
  * It just, feels familiar, he has 2 copies, both well-worn, he’s read it upwards of 50 times cover to cover, but he doesn’t just read it to read it. It’s…god, you know those books that just feel like home? That’s what TCoS feels like to Andrew. 
  * Aaron’d never say, but TCoS is his favorite too. 




	89. Chapter 89

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andrew and kids

Andrew is so good with children  
Their touch is so pure, innocent  
They never mean to harm  
They dont know, they’re oblivious to the horrors of the world  
His whole demeanor changes when he’s with them  
He smiles so much more  
He never discourages a child  
He entertains and humors  
He listens and talks  
He helps and nurtures

Andrew is so good with children  
But he knows that children have to grow up and face reality  
He knows that their innocence will one day cease  
That one day they will not be children anymore  
Which is why he never wants to be responsible for a child  
Bc he can’t deal with the thought of watching a child grow out of their innocence  
Seeing the wonder leave their eyes  
Feeling hopeless as reality sinks in  
And being helpless as he can do nothing but watch

Andrew is so good with children  
Which is why it breaks Neil’s heart as much as it does when Andrew refuses to have kids


	90. Chapter 90

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Gangsey meets the Foxes

 

I have this hc that even though Adam could get into an Ivy League of his choice, my humble son wouldn’t go that route. So, where better to go than Palmetto State University. (For the purpose of these hc’s y’all hush and just _go with it_ ) 

It’s after a game that Adam and his friends get invited to a party by some Vixens. The team’s there, and that’s how Adam meets the Foxes

He and Neil hit it off. Neil doesn’t like people, and interacting with anyone other than his team doesn’t usually end will, but when he meets Adam, there’s this aura about him that piques Neil’s interest. Adam doesn’t talk much but his words mean more bc theyre so succinct and to the point and Neil appreciates that. They become fast friends and the rest is history.

Fast forward to final championships that year and Adam goes to every Foxes game now, but he invites Blue, Gansey, and Henry bc they hadnt been too far away and Ronan didn’t mind coming down to visit

The Foxes win against the Trojans and theyre on top of the world, every last one of them, bc they know for sure that they are a /good/ team that plays fair and well and wins bc they can and not bc they have a point to prove

ahem 

a win means celebrations and the foxes/vixen clan along with all of PSU dont disappoint, and well, bc Adam and Neil are so close Neil texts Adam and asks where he is when he doensn’t see him near him, and then Adam brings his squad over 

and at this point everyones kind of adopted Adam bc if he were at all athletically inclined, he’d make a great Fox, but that doesnt mean he isnt welcome amongst them, esp when they’d gotten the chance to get to know him better

anyway 

he introduces the team to his friends and the gangsey is kind of awestruck as to how Adam managed to become so close to /The Foxes/ and well

Henry’s fangirling over p much everyone but he and Allison hit it off p quickly once the initial introductions are over with 

and I know yall like the idea of Gansey and Kevin bonding over being history buffs but pls consider - Gansey being able to keep up with Kevin, drinkwise and Kevin being horribly impressed when Gansey can hold a conversation with the same amount of alcohol in his system as Kevin who is literally about to pass out then and there 

Ronan and Andrew. Just - I…oh boi, ok. 

They hate each other, not in an Andreil way, but like…they both exude this aura of danger and either of the are fiercely protective of their respective families and they dont trust the other

But Adam and Neil get along so well, and they are so similar that once they get past the initial wariness around each other they bond really well over knives and cars and their boyfriends 

iliknnvlkfjk let me live you idiots

also for your consideration Blue and Dan’s relationship? the absolute badassery they both exude and revel in my feminist daughters not about to put up with anyones shit 

also imagine the wonder  on everyones faces when they meet a girl shorter (as short as??) than the twins  

also consider Blue on Matt’s shoulders bc WHY NOT 

 

Addition: 

 

Religion!!! Oh my god, pun not intended, (forgive me) icant believe i didnt remember that, but for real!! Ronan and Renee just!! Fuck i cant even put it into words, but like imagine how well theyd get along

The both notice the other has a cross around their neck and they go to church together and Matthew!!! Falling in love with Renee and Allison having to be like sorry babe she’s taken

And yes! Sexuality/Religion being a huge talking point in their relationship and Nicky!!!!!!!!!! Appreciating all of it bc none of it is what he grew up around and Nicky finding religion again, in the best way, advertently bc of Renee and Ronan!!!

And then obv when Renee starts whacking homophobes and the like with her bible, as per Nora’s extra content, Ronan just, a light bulb goes off and hes like this is it, best friends forever no take backs

Just asdfghjjkl i love them all with all my heart


	91. Chapter 91

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bia writes a little ReneexDan???

  * _Dan stared at her: first at the glittering cross necklace around her neck, then at the blood-smeared bible in her hand. She looked at Renee’s bruising face, and this time she really looked. She stared past Renee’s easy smile to the darkness in her pale stare._  
“You might be a little fucked up,” Dan said.  
“I did warn you,” Renee said.
  * Immm in love with Renee
  * as is Dan Wilds as soon as they exchange the same words once again 
  * It starts out rough. Dan is hurt bc she didn’t know that Renee was such a good person.
  * She hated Rainbow Bright on principle. She was the Wolves’ champion goalkeeper, the only goalkeeper Dan truly was challenged by 
  * Renee was a great goalie
  * but she was a better person 
  * and that made Dan angry 
  * bc who gave her the right to smile so softly 
  * and to never get angry 
  * no matter how bad she, or Matt, or Seth or Allison o r Andrew fucked up 
  * and they fucked up. So much and so hard that Wymack would search for strength and only find it in Renee 
  * And that 
  * hurt Dan even more than it angered her
  * bc Renee couldnt be perfect
  * she was still human, she had to have weaknesses
  * she had to have a chink in this facade she kept up day in and day out 
  * but for the life of her Dan couldnt find one 
  * but it didn’t stop hurting until Renee came to her one night 
  * After a nightmare that left her cheeks sticky and her breathing unsteady 
  * Dan would never forget how broken Renee looked at that moment, with no light but from the moon streaming through the open window, her hair shining silver and her cheeks shining bc of the tears, how she couldnt articulate words without sobbing 
  * how she stood before Dan, and reached forward, not taking, but offering her hand for Dan to take if she would. 
  * Dan understanding that if she didn’t take Renee’s hand, Renee would understand and wouldnt be hurt
  * bc Renee is a good. person. trying so hard not to be the mess that she is
  * Dan looking into Renee’s puffy eyes and sitting up in bed and moving over, so Renee could get in. 
  * Renee climbing in carefully and quietly
  * Them sitting next to each other against Dan’s headboard until Renee starts shaking harder and Dan puts an arm around her and Renee falls against her neck and cries and cries and cries until Dan realizes that every smile, every word, every action Renee puts forth is nothing but an immense show of strength and courage and bravery 
  * And Dan falls. 
  * She falls hard and fast and true  
  * “You might be a little fucked up.”  
“You wouldn’t have me any other way.” 




	92. Chapter 92

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: What if you do a prompts about neil slowly becoming obsess with troye sivan and Nicky join in on it too. And it could be like their thing

 

Neil was humming while writing a paper for English, his mind wandering, going through his sources, citing where he had to, adding, paraphrasing, tweaking, bullshitting it all basically. 

“Are you - is that FOOLS!? Nicky cut in, Neil looked up from his laptop and shrugged, not understanding the question. 

“Neil! You like Troye. Why the fuck wasn’t I aware?” Neil raised a brow, still lost. “Oh my god, he doesn’t even know what I’m talking about.” 

Neil didn’t even know who Nicky was talking to at this point. He gave Nicky a tight lipped smile and went back to his paper. He heard Nicky heave a frustrated sigh but chose to ignore it. 

It was half a minute later that Nicky had thrust his phone in front of Neil, the speakers playing  WILD at a pretty high volume, “Him. Do you know this song?” 

Neil ran a hand through his hair. _Yeah. Yeah I know the damn song Nicky_. “I guess?” 

Nicky grinned so wide Neil could see his molars. “Shit This is great. Have you listened to the rest of Blue Neighborhood?” Nicky was so excited Neil was impressed he wasn’t literally jumping.

“What now?” 

“His album, Neil.” 

“Whose? 

“Oh for fuck’s sake, you’re kidding.Troye’s. Troye Sivan?” 

“Uh. It’s Neil Josten, actually.” Neil could feel his lips twitch. _damnit_. 

“Neeeil, stop fucking with me, he’s my heart and soul, have a little respect.” Nicky was also having a hard time keeping a straight face, but that was his norm.

“Yeah, Nicky, I know Troy Minivan or whatever.” Neil was having way too much fun, but anything was better than writing about the rise and fall of the fishing industry at this point. 

Nicky snorted, ”Now you’re just trying too hard, kid.” 

Neil smiled. 

“Did you know he has a Youtube channel?” 

Neil’s smile slipped infinitesimally. 

“We could -” 

“No thanks Nicky,” Neil butt in, “I’ve got this paper. And I’m sure you’ve-” 

“Oh no, don’t worry about me, I’m always down for some Troye.”

Neil looked back at his laptop screen and then down at the word count that hadn’t changed more than 50 words in the past hour, then up to the clock. He sighed “1. Just 1.” 

Nicky smiled with his tongue between his teeth, “Absolutely.” 

*Later*

“Yo Neil, have you ever gotten Andrew to say he loves you?”

_“~You don’t have to say I love you to say I love you~”  
_

“BOI.” 


	93. Chapter 93

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron love with a side of angst as requested! 

 

 

Aaron saw red. “What the fuck do you mean no more dust? Where do you get off, huh?”

Andrew slid Aaron a cool look, “What? Can’t live without it?”

Aaron was murderous. “Fuck off, Andrew! Just because your boyfriend has a problem doesn’t give you the goddamn right -” 

“Your girlfriend know?” 

Aaron swallowed, his jaw clenched. “  - no fucking right.” 

“To what, bruv? Tell her? Not take dust?” 

Aaron didn’t say anything, but glared angrily at his brother. “Get the dust.” 

“No.”

“Andrew.” 

“Aaron.” 

Aaron could feel angry, or maybe frustrated, or maybe…desperate tears well up. He tried to leave the room before Andrew could say anything else, but Andrew’s low voice made itself heard anyway. 

“Don’t go looking for another way to get your fix.” 

* * *

“I can’t stand him.” 

“I know, babe.” Katelyn agreed with her boyfriend that was currently lying on her couch with his head in her lap.

Aaron huffed, bringing both hands to his face and rubbing. Katelyn’s hands stilled in his hair. She sighed, “I wish -” She stopped, considering, then she shook her head with a smile, not finishing her sentence. 

Aaron hummed, “What’s it?” he mumbled, as he turned so he was facing her stomach. 

“Nothing, dear.” 

Aaron swallowed, yawning, “Bed?” 

Katelyn smiled, “Bed.” 

* * *

“Aaron?” Katelyn called into Matt and Aaron’s dorm. “Aaron? Hon, you haven’t been answering your phone, I texted - Nicky?”

“Oh. Hey.” Nicky seemed uneasy, blocking the doorway to Aaron’s room. “Uh, Aaron’s not feeling well, contagious - you probably don’t wanna -” He stopped talking as Katelyn narrowed her eyes at him and stepped aside to let her pass. He opened his mouth to say something, but thought against it.

“Love?” 

Aaron wasn’t in the room. But the bathroom lights were on, the door ajar “Aaron? She called lightly as she slowly opened the door farther, “Oh…love.” 

Aaron was sitting against the tub, white as a sheet, his eyes sunken, hands clammy, and body shuddering. “No -” It came out weak, not at all like the Aaron she knew.

Katelyn was breathing heavy, controlled. _Withdrawal. “_ Okay…okay.” She sniffed, then swallowed, “Okay.” She nodded to herself. _Okay. “_ You need” _help_ “some salt in you system” She turned. “Nicky. Go find some methadone.” 

“Where the heck am I supposed to -” Katelyn gave him a look. “Right. We live in an athlete’s dorm. Find the drug dealer.. -s. No problemo.” 

Katelyn walked back into their kitchen, there wasn’t much in the fridge, but there was gatorade. All she needed. 

“C’mere.” She sat down next to Aaron. He struggled to move away from her, “Hush. None of that.” She cracked open the bottle, “Drink.” 

Aaron brought a shaking hand up to take the bottle from her, Katelyn didn’t let it go but brought her hand up along with his, tipping the bottle against his lips. 

He fell asleep some hours later against her shoulder.

* * *

“I told you not to go looking for another fix.”

If Aaron had ever been angry in his life before paled in comparison to the fury he was feeling at Andrew’s implication. 

“Katelyn -” He ground out between his clenched teeth, “Is. Not. - “ Aaron turned away, unable to finish the thought. 

He brought his trembling fists to his sides and walked out without another word. 


	94. Chapter 94

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anon asked : Okay so I saw some of your hcs and I was thinking like i really want to know what the other foxes thought when they finally found out,not just what happened to Andrew in Collumbia but in his childhood as well. Would they regret calling him a monster?

 

 

So this is basically just me talking im sorry if you wanted hcs or something? Also im sorry that this has been sitting in my inbox for…goodness knows how long

ahem

In all honesty…I don’t think the foxes will ever know Andrew’s life story. I don’t think Andrew’s gonna be ok with that? And if they ever do get…a glimpse, it’s gonna be when the details of Aaron’s trial come up? Bc im p sure Andrew forbade anyone going to the trial, but…

Like, they all figure out what happened with Drake and in all honesty I’m sure they all blanched super hard the second they did…Renee had probably some clue bc Andrew was p truthful with her

But for the rest of them? Dan probably almost threw up bc she knew he’d been through some shit but they had all assumed that they’d all had around as bad as Andrew did, but they were wrong and Dan just…she is his captain. that means something, if not to him, to her. 

Allison prob didn’t want it to be shown that it hit her hard, but she knows, she knows and renee knows after she goes to renee about it. She feels absolutely terrible for ever calling Andrew names or thinking he was a bad person for the sake of being a bad person 

Andrew hates it 

He hates that they arent treating him the same way they had been for the years before and he needs them to stop he needs normalcy and he’s not getting that from Nicky bc his cousin cant even look at him too long before his face falls

Aaron isnt much better, they didnt talk much before but after he came off the meds completely its like Aaron is treading thin ice when talking to Andrew and Andrew is gonna punch his twin in the gut real soon if he doesnt stop 

Kevin is also..not cooperating, he’s being - nice and andrew hates him all the more for it. he doesnt need kevin to talk to him at a normal volume, he doesnt want a reasonable kevin, he wants the real kevin, the asshole, but his kevin nonetheless

Matt seems to be andrews only solace aside from neil. Matt doesnt treat him any differently, they dont talk any more or any less than they used to, aside from when he and Neil become closer and matt eventually spending more time with the cousins/kevin when the girls graduate 

but yeah, matt just. understanding, empathizing bc he knows what it was like to be assaulted the way andrew was at a young age and that shared experience leading to a grudging understanding friendship between two polar opposites and andrew being ok with that

but no, they dont stop calling the monsters the monsters 

But monster stops having the same inflection, they use it as a nickname, not an insult


	95. Chapter 95

a ~~not~~ short, incomplete list of things, experiences, people, etc. that Andrew has no choice but to remember the exact details of (abuse tw) 

  * every unwanted, unwarranted, unsolicited hand on his body that he cant rid the feeling of no matter how hard he scrubs at his skin till its raw and red and sometimes bleeding when he rubs open a scabbed over scar now needing to heal all over again 
  * every insult, every name, every last bully that he’s ever met in his life, he remembers every word of all those exchanges - he remembers back to when he used to care, when those words used to hurt, when he used to try to fight back, to stand up to those bullies - but he also remembers the exact exchange when all the fight left him and he couldnt bring himself to even acknowledge that he was being talked at, sneered at the same way as the last time, but how, this time he just. didnt care. 
  * he remembers the names of all his foster brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers no matter how hard hes tried to forget most of them he remembers their faces and their voices and the exact conversations hes had with some of them, but he also remembers the lack of conversations with others 
  * he remembers every slap…punch, kick, kiss…
  * he remembers how, when he said the _right_ thing, scripted and total lies on his part, how some of his foster mothers would smile at him just the _right_ way so he could pretend for just that second he had someone who cared 
  * he remembers how each and every one of those foster mothers let him down time after time after time after 
  * he remembers every name they called him, ever soft ‘Andrew’ when they first met him, every time if turned from soft to sharp, every time it turned from sharp to silence
  * it’s the silence that cut deeper than anything - that hurt the most
  * till it didn’t hurt at all 
  * he remembers every handshake, every pat down, every uncalled for shove from police or foster families or other authorities in his life 
  * he remembers every time he’d been but in handcuffs and every conversation he’s had in the back of a police car, or lack of conversation on his part 
  * he remembers Cass 
  * he remember officer Higgins
  * he remembers Tilda, he remembers the lack of Tilda 
  * he remembers Drake 
  * he remembers the lack of remembrance, after they started him on the drugs
  * how they messed with his brain, with his memory 
  * how even though they tried to change parts of him, his memory remained, how even through his drug-addled brain, he remembered conversations and people, and sessions with Bee and meeting the Foxes, meeting Wymack
  * he remembers feeling different in this group of people than he ever did in any foster family 
  * he remembers his deal with Aaron, the exact words that were exchanged
  * he remembers Nicky, exactly how he looked after being beat up that one night 
  * he remembers how Allison and Seth had made it clear they wanted nothing to do with him and how he had heard it all before 
  * he remembers Dan, he remembers how, through what little words she said to him, she reminded him of Cass 
  * he remembers her the night they took Matt out to Columbia, and just how close he saw her to snapping 
  * Neil makes it hard to forget Matt
  * and Kevin makes it hard to forget him, but Andrew does remember the promise they made 
  * …he remembers a lot of promises 
  * he remembers Neil 
  * he remembers ever wanted, warranted, solicited touch and kiss and and bite and caress
  * every yes and every no
  * he remembers every word the two of them exchanged after Proust 
  * he remembers Baltimore as if it were yesterday
  * he remembers every question and answer and pause in conversation and every too-fast sentence that one of them just had to get out 
  * he remembers what Neil wore to his graduation 
  * he remembers what Neil wore when Andrew came to visit the year after
  * he could verbally tell you the exact way Neil looks like in his gear, down to the grass stain on the bottom left corner of his jersey and the wrinkles from how he folds his clothes the wrong way and the way the fabric is stretched a bit too much at the back where he hangs his clothes on the hook in the locker room  
  * he remembers the feel Neil’s scars under his fingertips 
  * he remembers the feel of Neil’s scarred face under his palm
  * he remembers the cat conversation and the apartment theyd have to get to accommodate them all 
  * he remembers their first night in said apartment 
  * he remembers every damn time he has to write out a grocery list when its Neil’s turn to do the groceries and how Neil just has to yell what he needs from the kitchen as Andrew throws on a sweatshirt and leaves with a “AND CILANTRO!” being yelled out of the window  
  * he remembers when Neil stopped saying “don’t forget [xyz]” bc Neil realized that Andrew never forgot, just ignored when he wanted to 
  * he remembers every version of their “i hate you” their “100%” their “nothing” their “not wanting anything” conversations over the years
  * he remembers every promise he made and kept to Neil 
  * and every one Neil made and kept to him 
  * and yeah 
  * he still remembers the bad and the ugly and the unsightly 
  * but he has Neil to make memories with, happy and good and better 
  * he has that 
  * and he’s forever grateful that he remembers every “thank you” and soft “i love you” and softer “Andrew” 




	96. Chapter 96

bear with me…

  * neils got blisters so many blisters along the heels and balls of his feet and he usually has one or two toes bandaged bc they were bleeding from how much he runs and practices 
  * hes got dry ankles and banged up and bruised and cut knees almost all season 
  * he has that light ginger almost blond body hair covering his arms and legs and body thats so light that in the right light it looks like hes completely shaven 
  * his calves and thighs are probably the thinnest but most defined of the whole team even allison cant compete with the definition of neils upper thighs bc of how much and how fast this kid can run 
  * hes got freckles along his legs and up his back they arent in any sort of pattern theres probably not even that many theyre just spread randomly on him 
  * hes got this birthmark that looks like a bruise on his right outer thigh that he pokes and prods waiting for it to heal but never realizes that its permanent he just thinks he keeps bruising that particular place over and over again 
  * neils got a rather defined stomach as well perhaps not as much as say kevin or matt or even dan but he has a v clear 4 pack that could be a 6 pack if kevin had his way with neils diet 
  * hes got scars 
  * old and new that have just become a part of him as much as every freckle 
  * theres a gunshot wound from when he was 14 on his lower left flank other scars from where gunshots scraped past him 
  * other times when shrapnel pierced his skin
  * and multiple knife wounds, stabbings and deep cuts, each once had a story that not even andrew knew yet 
  * some had stories that neil would rather not remember himself 
  * he doesnt have a v broad chest but its still p defined as well 
  * hairless which hes not sure how he feels about esp when andrews not 
  * his arms are nice but more lean and less defined and muscular for the sake of muscles 
  * he has long arms that were a problem when he was younger and they got in the way while he was growing they still look a little out of place considering hes not v tall still but he has arms that rival nickys in length
  * he has a scar right by his collar bone where hed been stabbed and another along his neck that you couldnt see unless neil was looking directly up in good lighting 
  * from when he had had a man start to slice his throat when his mother hadnt dropped her gun fast enough even when her sons life had been on the line and deeper still even after she had dropped it 
  * he has small ears 
  * rather ears that dont stand out too much esp when he lets his curls grow out, he eventually gets quite a few piercings along his left ear leaving the other alone 
  * he has a very chiseled face his jawline very defined his cheekbones hidden behind a couple of bad scars 
  * his eyelashes and eyebrows a shade or two darker than the hair on his head and his eyes the color of an iceberg framed by long lashes and and crows feet that he gets from his mom 
  * Andrew has small feet…not necessarily _small,_ but smaller than Neil’s 
  * He’s got light brown/dirty blond body hair and this boy is hai ry 
  * hairy lil baby 
  * i digress 
  * hes got calves that should scare you, not necessarily v huge and strong like Neil’s, but so ridiculously defined even the football players are jealous 
  * his knees are soft but still scratched up and scarred just like the rest of the foxes 
  * his thighs are a little chubby bc that sugars gotta go _somewhere_
  * that somewhere being his chubby thighs and chubby butt and slightly squishy abs that shouldnt be abs but ARE bc my son exercises 
  * this boiiii
  * i love him so much idk what to do with myself 
  *  anyway 
  * hes hairy like i mentioned so i mean im not, no, no im totally saying happy trail
  * also can we talk about these idiots and the v defined V’s they both sport 
  * like 
  * stop it you two 
  * but also never stop i support and love - i digress 
  * where tf was i 
  * oh
  * the..scars 
  * Andrew’s got scars along the tops and sides of his thighs, those were all him 
  * he’s got barbed wire scars from a stint gone right and only those scars to prove it, all along his right hip and onto his stomach and the top side of his right thigh 
  * he’s got freckles, a lot of them, along the small of his back, along the back of his thighs, and down his spine, some bunched up at the back of his neck
  * hes got small hands, but pianist fingers, long and thin and knobby 
  * he’s got scars on scars on scars on his knuckles from various fights with people and the couple times he smashed a mirror with his fists
  * he wears his armbands at all times, im just…wait. a hijab. I wear a hijab at all times except when I’m home and/or around people I can take it off with, and that has nothing to do with this, but really…parallels well with the armbands 
  * wow i derailed im sorry 
  * anyway his armbands hide the worst scars
  * the ones around both his wrists, the ones that have since scabbed over but still sometimes itch that he tries his best to ignore 
  * hes got sharp, banged up elbows and 
  * broad shoulders and chest to match 
  * he probably does one handed push ups to one up Kevin bc he knows how much it pisses him off
  * he’s got a long neck, and a sharp collarbone that Neil adores
  * a necklace of hickies as proof 
  * his hair usually stay up and out of his face most of the time, but sometimes if he brushes it down it covers his eyes and he does that head jerk thing short haired people do to get it out of the way and he has soft hair and Neil loves pulling on it and running his fingers through it 
  * anyway this got way too longjust take it




	97. Chapter 97

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asked:
> 
> andriel prompt: literally anything angsty at the beginning that ends with them being happy and safe and sharing a bed because they feel safe being closer to each other

“Neil.” 

A whisper, a murmur, a prayer, a plea rolled into one. Andrew’s breath hitched in this throat. 

“Neil..” A little, not by much, louder than before. 

Still Neil didn’t hear from their bedroom to the kitchen where he was feeding the cats. 

Andrew took in a breath through his mouth, it hitched, he choked, took another sharp breath, louder than any utterance of Neil’s name. 

““Drew?” Neil’s curious tone wafted through the open doorway. 

“Neil” Another whisper, quieter than the first two times. This time his voice quivered with the onset of hysteria. 

“Andrew. What’s wrong?” Neil leaned his shoulder against their doorjamb. Andrew was staring wide eyed at his hands. 

“Ca -” Andrew took in another shaky breath, “Can’t see.” 

Neil’s brow furrowed at the same time he lifted an eyebrow. He used his hip to push away from the door. 

“What do you mean?” Neil paused as he saw Andrew’s entire frame trembling slightly. “Andrew?” A hint of panic. 

“I can’t -” Andrew swallowed, his throat parched. “- see.” 

Neil’s mouth opened, no words came to mind. He wasn’t sure what was happening. “Where are your glasses?” 

“Neil!” The panic evident in Andrew’s voice. “Everything’s - “ his voice cracked, “-everything black.” He took a steadying breath, his hands were shaking visibly. “ _Fuck_.” He whispered under his breath.  _Not again_. 

Neil wasted another few seconds staring dumbfounded at Andrew. His mouth opened and closed a couple times. He swallowed. “Shit…Andrew? The hospital? Shit - What - You -” 

“No. Just - it’s, I don’t know - it’s happened before.” 

Neil was shaking his head in shock, “What?” 

Andrew hands opened and closed into fists. “Kind of - anxiety bullshit, Bee explained…” 

“Andrew. You can’t see?” 

“Yes, dumbass. I just said so.” 

Neil ran a hand down his face.  _What the fuck?_  “Are you close to a panic attack?” 

“This is the panic attack!” Andrew snapped, his hands still shaking, the hysteria making his voice an octave higher than usual. 

“Your’e okay.” Neil’s voice was firm. He threw away any question he had a second ago and focused on talking Andrew down. 

“I know that.” Andrew mumbled back. His nose twitched, he blinked slowly. “Ugh” He groaned. “Fucking hate -” He left his sentence unfinished. “Talk.” 

Neil took 2 seconds, before, “There’s this guy I know, his uncle killed his dad.” 

Andrew let out a sharp giggle. “What the  _fuck_?” Neil ignored the way his voice quivered.

“Yeah…he didn’t know it was his uncle though. His dad died, and he thought it was his fault - which it wasn’t, but, like, the dude grew up believing it. That shit fuck’s with you, y’know?” 

Andrew didn’t respond. Neil continued. “Yeah, so, uh, he finds out about his uncle and gets his revenge by killing him…” Neil wracked his brain, what else could he talk about? 

Andrew’s brow furrowed, his eyes narrowing, “Is that - Shakespeare?” 

“Lion King,” Neil mumbled disgruntled, he didn’t think Andrew had read Hamlet or watched the movie so he’d thought it a safe story to tell.

“You’re dumb.” 

“Yeah, well.” 

Andrew’s lip twitched. His eyes closed. He took a deep breath slowly through his mouth. His shoulders rising and falling. He shook his head slowly. “I’m okay.” 

Neil’s eyes widened. “You can see?” 

“Not yet, just…the rest of it.” Neil noticed his hands had stopped shaking. He nodded to himself. 

“Okay…Okay.” Neil let out a quiet sigh, “That’s good.” 

Andrew swallowed. “C’mere.” 

Neil moved from where he was standing over Andrew to sit next to him on the edge of their bed, not touching him, but close enough to feel his body heat. 

Andrew licked his lips, they felt chapped. He swallowed. He was still blinking slowly. Neil bit the inside of his lip. 

Andrew sighed, his shoulders fell, the tension released between his shoulder blades. He slowly let his head fall over and back against Neil’s shoulder. 

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Just listening to each others breathing. Andrew feeling Neil’s heart beat in his chest. 

More time passed. 

“Can you see?” 

“Yeah.” 

Neil made to move. 

Andrew didn’t. 

“Not yet.” 

Neil smiled gently, 

“Okay.”


	98. Chapter 98

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anonymous asked:
> 
> could you do an andreil where neil’s not doing good but is doing his best to hide it and the long distance makes it to where it takes longer for andrew to figure it out than it would usually.? and the results of all that..

(TW suicidal thought/actions)

* * *

Neil wasn’t sleeping. 

The coffee helped. The Monster helped more. Both helped the most. 

* * *

Neil wasn’t eating. 

It was fine, he just didn’t always have time in between class, homework, practice, games, working at the Palmetto bookstore, and an internship. 

* * *

Neil hadn’t talked to Andrew in 2 weeks. 

Which, with both their busy, clashing, different-time-zoned schedules, wasn’t abnormal. They’d gone longer than that before. 

* * *

Everything was  _fine_.

* * *

Neil and Andrew may have gone longer than 2 weeks without talking, but Neil had never withdrew from his whole team for 2 whole weeks before. 

They figured he was just swamped with work, which happened during finals for everyone. So it wasn’t a big deal. Everyone was sleep deprived and overworked. Why would Neil be special.? 

* * *

Well for one, none of the team, but Neil, had passed out midfield. 

* * *

When he woke up in the school’s infirmary, with 2 IVs in both his arms, in the middle of the night, his initial feeling of disappointment for waking up at all should have bothered him more than it did. 

He looked around the room. His phone was on a side table next to his bed. He clicked it on and dialed Andrew on autopilot. He had a fleeting thought of time and time zones but ignored himself. He didn’t care. 

Andrew picked up at the 6th tone. 

“Neil?” 

“Andrew.” Neil cleared his throat, his throat dry from misuse. 

“What are you doing up, isn’t it like 3 something?” 

“In the infirmary.” Nonchalantly, his tone airy. 

“What for?” Sharp, his tone concerned. 

“Don’t really remember. Think I probably passed out…Might’ve been dehydration. Or sleep deprivation…maybe…” He trailed off. Andrew didn’t need to know more.

“Neil.” 

“Hmm…?” 

“What’s going on? What happened?” 

“Tol’ you, don’t remember.” 

“Neil.” 

Neil swallowed.  _Oh well_. “I woke up, ‘Drew. Isn’t that enough?”

“Neil -” Exasperated. “What does that mean, what are you -” 

Neil let out a breath, “Who cares?”

Andrew paused. “Me.” 

Neil snorted softly, “Why.”

Neil heard the soft noise of Andrew’s mouth opening, but no words came through the phone. 

Neil heard his own voice as if he were listening to a recording, or, watching himself in a dream, or…something. 

“Didn’t wanna wake up, ‘Drew…didn’t wanna…do it anymore.’ 

Andrew was silent, but Neil knew he was listening. 

“I miss you.”  _Maybe_.

Nothing but breathing from Andrew’s end. 

Neil had the errant thought that his silence should have probably hurt, but he felt nothing but numbness. Not that they’d given him any pain medication. A different kind of numbness. 

“Bad…” He tried again, his words not working, “Mm…” He sighed, “‘don’ know…” 

“I’m calling Bee.” 

Neil didn’t say anything. He didn’t care. 

“Don’t do anything Neil. Don’t move. Don’t get up. Don’t.” Final. 

Neil let his head fall against his pillow, Whatever. 

“I’m calling you back in 5. Okay?” 

Whatever. 

Andrew hung up. 

Whatever. 

* * *

The next time Neil woke up Betsy Dobson was in his room. 

He swatted the disappointment away again. 

She was talking on her cellphone. Neil felt around his bed to check the time on his cellphone but couldn’t find it. 

“He’s awake.” Neil looked up as Bee referred to him. She was talking into his cellphone, which was why he couldn’t find it.

The fleeting thought of being worried about Andrew crossed his mind. Didn’t care. 

“Here.” Bee handed the phone to Neil, he stared at it for a moment before realizing Andrew was still on, on the other end. 

“I’m fine”

“3000% you asshole.” 

“Damn, didn’t think I’d ever hear another one of those.” 

“Bee’s staying. I’m coming this weekend.” 

“Mm, no. Don’t do that.”  

“Too damn bad.” 

Neil sighed. 

Whatever. 

* * *

It was Friday night that Andrew’s flight landed. 

Bee hadn’t left him alone for 3 days. There was always someone with him. 

Not, that he cared. 

Although, he did care about the rush of pure  _emotions_ that went through him when he saw Andrew, clad in back jeans, a gray shirt, and charcoal coat, climb out of the drivers side of a sleek black rental. 

He did care how his knees almost buckled from the floodgate of relief. 

He did care about how his chest throbbed painfully at the sight of Andrew’s face. 

He didn’t care that his nails had carved half-moons into both his palms. 

Andrew gave Bee a hug in greeting, murmuring something, before turning to face Neil. He nodded to Bee. She let them alone. 

Andrew took a step closer to Neil. Neil thought about stepping back, but he knew he couldn’t. He didn’t want to. 

Andrew didn’t say anything. He waited patiently. 

After a minute of staring at each others faces, Neil’ breathing sped up a smidge. He stepped forward and Andrew’s arms wrapped around his frame. Andrew’s heart dropped as he realized his arms overlapped a lot more than the last time he’d hugged Neil. 

They stood like that for a moment. Neil let out a trembling breath against Andrew’s shoulder, his entire frame trembling with the breath.  

“I’m sorry.” 

_It’s okay_. 

“You’re gonna be okay.” 

 

 


End file.
